You Can Be The Best You Can Be.

I came up with a simple and powerful tool the other day. I was standing in my office in front of a large Post-It notepad sheet with a red sharpie in my hand (red delivers intention!) — and the ideas just flowed. What did I come up with to help you be the best? To be the best you can be, there are four stages to success — Find Me, Want Me, Sell Them, Close Them. This works for the corporate executive, to the aspiring entrepreneur, all the way to the person in transition. It's simple, it's direct, and it works. Let me explain each one:

STAGE ONE: FIND ME

We go through our lives partially hidden to key influential people and once-in-a-lifetime opportunities. We either sit at our desk toiling away, make cold calls to people who don't want our services, or hide at home and send out electronic résumés to closed positions. And we wonder why we aren't moving up, getting the best clients, or landing that dream job. It's frustrating.

The best businesses are easy to find - a big sign, the best location — the ability to stand out and be a billboard so millions of people can see you:

• Executive: When was the last time you introduced yourself to the leaders in you organization? Do they know you?

• Business Owner: New signage, new website, new branding — getting out and touching lots of people?

• Transitional: Keywords on LinkedIn, writing articles, hitting industry meetings, hitting the library?

STAGE TWO: WANT ME

Okay — now we are being seen by the powers that be. What do we do now? We want them to WANT US. How do we do that?

You need to develop your own personal brand that will engage your audience and get them to see your ability, your product, and your talents:

• Executive: What can you do to really help your company? If you've done it, do you brag about it? Be bold.

• Business Owner: What one thing do you do that can change people's lives or fill a hole in their life? Spotlight your brand.

• Transitional: Polish your image and brand - hit the gym, change your fashions, and show them what you can do for them. No begging.

STAGE THREE: SELL THEM

They've seen us and they want us. It's time to sell them and show them we are the best choice (this is where most fail).

You need to develop an iron-clad delivery that will make them better understand what you can do for them and that you're the only person on this earth who can do it. Find the BURNING issue that keeps them awake at night and show them how you will solve it.

• Executive: Think big - what are the real issues your company/industry are facing right now? Figure out some powerful solutions.

• Business Owner: Who are your biggest/best customers? What aren't you doing for them that will change their life?

• Transitional: It's not what you did - it's what you can do for them RIGHT NOW. Pinpoint what that is and deliver it.

STAGE FOUR: CLOSE THEM

Everyone forgets this one. They market, produce the itch, and make the sale — then they forget to close or leave them hanging.

Once you've sold them — get them to sign on the dotted line. Don't feel that it's their job to jump into the boat after you've hooked them — take them off your line and place them nicely in your cooler.

• Executive: Once they are interested in you — try to offer yourself to help them with a major initiative or pitch. You have the time.

• Business Owner: Once they are sold — make the closing process simple, easy, transparent, and fluid. It should be pleasurable for the customer.

• Transitional: Ask for the job. Get them to commit. Show them that you can leave for a better opportunity. Sign on the dotted line.

If you stick to this method and produce key deliverables for each stage — I promise you — you will be THE BEST YOU CAN BE.

Treading Water Is The Same As Drowning.

Many people today feel they are just 'one bad decision away' from losing their job or business. So instead of making decisions, they make NO decision. Or if they have to make a decision, they take the least offensive, least impactful, least expensive, and most spineless way out. Most of the time, that's the wrong thing to do.

What happens? You ensure management is happy while you infuriate your staff, vendors, and smart clients.

Who thinks big and takes chances? Apple.

• In 1998 — they launched the iMac without a floppy disk drive ("How will we transfer files?).
• In 2007 — they launched the iPhone - no experience (joining the fray with huge, entrenched leaders).
• In 2010 — they launched the MacBook Air without a DVD drive ("How will I watch movies?").
• In 2016 — they launched a new MacBook Pro with 4 USB-C ports ("How will I connect my stuff?).

Each time the media made fun of them and pundits attacked. One year later, everyone embraced the change and moved forward. The result? One of the biggest companies on the planet with a product line admired by all.

To move up and to be noticed by the people that matter, you need to be bold and sometimes stick your neck out. You might hit a home run (most of the time) and sometimes, you might get it cut off (rarely).

That's why I suggest to my clients that they all have INSURANCE. For example:

• An up-to-date résumé, done by a professional, ready to be distributed at a moment's notice.
• A polished and professional LinkedIn page, with recent professional headshot, testimonials, etc.
• Actively networking and connecting with movers and shakers outside of your sphere.
• Learning new things about your industry, taking classes, reading books and writing about what you learn.
• Attending events (industry symposiums, charities, etc.).
• Finally, hire a coach — they help you perform at your peak and help you make the tough decisions.

Once you have those things in your back pocket, it's not that hard to make the tough decisions that need to be made.

Here's a powerful scene with John Goodman (it's a bit rough with the language — but you'll get the gist):

Networking Sucks.

There — I said it. Networking sucks. Anyone who likes networking isn't networking, they're connecting (stick with me).

Anyone who hates networking is probably networking. And doing it badly.

If you meet someone and they try to 'sell' you on their product or service, that's networking. What they really should be doing is connecting. Connecting is where you try to 'connect' with that person. Where . . .

• You take a concerted interest in who that person is and what they do.
• You get them interested in you (not your business).
• You get them to feel your passion, intensity, enthusiasm, confidence, single-minded purpose, & fearlessness.
• The feeling we’ve won the game before it starts.

Because if I bumped into someone who portrayed half of those qualities — I most certainly would want to get to know them better. And help them. And mention them to my clients.

Why You Don't Meet People For Lunch.

You're too busy for lunch. We're all busy — you might have time management or delegation issues. Or you can't say 'NO'. It takes too much time. No it doesn't — and I'll show you a way to make it much shorter.

I wouldn't know what to talk about. You shouldn't talk — ask lots of questions and LISTEN.

I hate people. Okay — you got me there. Move to a far-away land and live like a hermit.

To have a healthy business or career, you should be meeting someone for lunch at least once a week (if not more). That's 52 new or strengthened relationships built in a year. Connecting with people bring new ideas, new strategies, and new energy to your mind and body. It's an essential part of the business cycle. But for some reason, you don't do it.

Sometimes going out to lunch takes too much time:

• Closing up what your doing, getting on your coat and exiting your building - 10 minutes
• Traveling to the lunch location - 10-20 minutes
• Arriving early - 10 minutes
• Lunch - 60-90 minutes
• Traveling from the lunch location - 10-20 minutes
• Entering your office, coat off, getting settled, and back to what you were doing - 10 minutes

All totaled, we're talking 110-160 minutes — virtually 2-3 hours out of your workday. Now some people would say (like me), "It's part of the job and I have to schedule around it." But most people will say, "Candidly, I don't have 2-3 hours to waste out of my workday." AND THEY NEVER HAVE ANOTHER BUSINESS LUNCH.

I've solved that problem. Don't have that lunch.

Instead, I call people in the morning. Every day, I pick two people who I want to call to touch base and see how they're doing. What do I do?

• I make sure I catch them at a weird time - 7:30 AM or 5:30 PM. I call when they don't expect it.
• I keep it REALLY short - no more than 10 minutes.
• I energize my voice and keep the tone and rhythm to keep their attention.
• I keep the call all about them - I ask questions, listen, follow up with more questions.
• I add humor, anecdotes, or anything I can think of to make my call FUN.
• I then say, "I've taken too much of your time, let me let you go..."
• I end with an intention, "Let's connect again in a few months..."
• And then I hang up. 

Bang! Connected with a colleague in 10 minutes. They feel good about you — you feel good about them — and you've refreshed your relationship with a past friend, colleague, or client. It's SO easy. When you call them again in 3-6 months, they will be happy to receive your call because it will be short and energize their day. THEY WILL WANT TO TALK WITH YOU!

Here's the best part — if you work 250 days a year, you can connect with over 500 people. Think of the possibilities!

Try it — my charge to you this morning is to reach out to two people and talk with them for no more than 10 minutes. You will find it so easy to do. And it works!

P.S. Here's the REAL reason I do it — they feel good about you, they remember you . . . and they recommend you. My business is BOOMING!

How To Network Like A Pro.

Last night, I was invited to attend a gala event at the prominent investment firm in NYC. There were 500-600 people there to meet, greet, and listen to great speakers talk about the market.  I was invited by one of my past clients - so I didn't break in uninvited like I usually do. Just kidding.

Here are some key techniques that I used to make the night a fruitful and productive one:

1. Don't Go To Ask For Leads, Go There To Help People Get Leads.

So many people HATE networking. Why? When you go around a room full of begging for business and connections, it SUCKS. You have to change your perspective 180° and go to HELP people and not ask for help. You are there to connect — get to know them, understand their needs, and figure out how to help them.

2. Show Up Early.

Ensure that you actually get there and are parked safely way ahead of time. With traffic, wrong turns and accidents, you never know what will impact your travel. It also gives you time to get the lay of the land, see how people are dressed/acting, and talk to some of the support staff to learn about the building/event. My client actually scoped out the location the day before, got a guided tour of the building from security, and learned all about the history of the building - which he used as a talking point when he networked. BRAVO!

3. Wear Your Nametag The RIGHT Way.

Bring your own in addition to the one that they provide. Nametags are CRITICAL to the networking process. Unfortunately, most event planners get a big 'F-' when they design the nametag. Usually, your name (the most important item on the nametag) is too small and their logo is too big. Morgan Stanley did it right - my name was nice and big (even enlarging my first name) all to make it stand out and readable from a distance. I also had my personal nametag in my breast pocket of my suit - just in case they failed misarably with the layout. Also - pin/clip your nametag to your left lapel (right side if you are looking down). Why? When you shake hands with someone, it allows their eyes to follow up your arm to your nametag. Trust me - this is the best way for people to remember your name.

4. Triangulate Your Body.

When networking with a partner, many people tend to face one another. This is a huge faux pas. By doing this, you literally cut yourself off from everyone else and announce (with your body language) that any intrusion into your conversation is not welcome. My client and I actively 'triangulated' ourselves at a 45 degree angle when we spoke. This invited others to mingle in and introduce themselves without fear of intrusion.

5. Always Have A Free Hand.

Juggling a drink and an appetizer plate? Put one down. Always have a free hand to shake hands, make a point, or touch someone to enforce an idea. I can't tell you how many people bumble and juggle their drink/food when you first meet them. It doesn't leave a good first impression.

6. Act Like A Host.

Nervous about walking up to people and introducing yourself? Just act like a host - walk up, introduce yourself, and ask how their night is going. Or how the food is. Or is their wine up to snuff. They will never ask you if you are the host - they will just infer that you are an important person and you care about their welfare. A great way to start a professional relationship!

7. Always Talk About THEM.

Bottom line, who cares about you? Only YOU. So always position the conversation around the person you are talking to. Use my technique - Ask a question, listen, repeat. The more your ask questions, the more you learn about the person you are talking to AND the more that they are engaged into the conversation. This allows you to position and align any answers you provide to their interests.

There are so many more - but these are the best for now.

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. Want to expand your networking success? Let’s talk. I’ve worked with thousands of people who wanted to take assertive steps in this area — call or email me to schedule a complimentary session.

Image: Royalty-Free License from Dollar Photo Club 2014.

Are You Feeling Guilty At Work?

I'm feeling guilty today. The funny thing is . . . I shouldn't. Every Tuesday, like clockwork, I attend my networking/sales team meeting with approximately 50 people.

It's called BNI (Business Networking International), a worldwide organization where businesspeople meet to learn about their services and deliver hot referrals (CLIENTS) each week. I find it powerful for my business (it delivers 40-45% of my clients each year) and wouldn't miss it for the world. In fact, if you have a business or a product to sell, BNI is THE place to go to increase your bottom line.

What happened?

Today, I'm missing my weekly meeting. I had to double-book a client over my meeting and could not schedule it for any other time this week. They HAD to meet at this time. And I did ALL the right things a BNI member should do:

I notified the leadership team of my absence.

I replace my open spot for the week with a great substitute who will do my commercial.

I let the visitor host team know of my sub so they could list them on our weekly roster.

And I did it all on-time, prior to our meeting.

I still feel guilty. I feel that I'm letting my colleagues down even though I've taken all the steps to ensure my absence is covered this week. Why do I feel guilty?

I feel like I'm letting my BNI colleagues down.

I feel that I'm missing out on something good.

That regular burst of enthusiasm I receive from attending will not be there this week.

Honestly, I shouldn't feel guilty. NOT ONE BIT. Why? Guilt is all about the PAST. And guess what? There's nothing I can do about it. NOTHING. It's in the past.

I've made a decision, I've prepared my absence — I've taken all the steps to ensure I shouldn't feel guilt about missing my meeting. So it's time to confront my guilt and realize I have to live in the present and move on from this 'fake' feeling. Why?

It's holding me back — I'm focusing on something that really doesn't matter.

I'm expending mental and physical energy towards a belief that is not true.

I'm not focusing on the present or planning for the future. This is where I can make serious progress towards my goals.

So the next time you feel GUILTY, remember it's all in the past and there's nothing you can really do about it. Take that guilt and repurpose its energy into the present and future. You will find yourself working faster, better, and with more enthusiasm.

Guilt is a mechanism for us to remember past mistakes so we don't repeat them — don't let it paralyze you.

I'D LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR GUILT AT WORK. LET ME KNOW BELOW.

How To Give A Good Compliment.

Here’s something I’ve found to help me open up conversations, give people a lift, and raise my self-esteem at the same time. There’s nothing like a warm, sincere compliment to make your day. Instead of waiting for one, why not give one out? Take it from me, the more you give, the more you find you’ll receive.

Make your compliment specific. “That necklace looks really good on you” makes a bigger impact compared to “you look really good today”. The more specific the better, it makes the person feel like you notice them.

Back up your compliment. Don’t just stop at “that necklace looks really good on you”. Your compliment becomes stronger when you say why you think so; “that necklace looks really good on you because it matches your eyes”.

Ask a question with your compliment. And if you want to use it as a conversational starter, ask a question about the subject of your compliment; “that necklace looks really good on you because it matches your eyes. Where did you find it?”.

Why Giving Compliments Raises Your Self-Esteem It takes confidence and self-esteem to notice good things about others and to make the first caring move to tell them about it.

When I first started giving compliments I was awkward and shy about it. I kept wondering if I’d offend them in some way or make people suspicious about what I wanted from them. I’ve since discovered that a sincere compliment is always a welcome boost to someone’s day. There will be those that reject it or will even argue with you, but that’s usually their problem and not yours. A compliment is like a gift, if someone doesn’t want your gift you’ll still end up owning it. The best way to accept one is also like a gift, just say ‘thank you’. You’ll also find when you start noticing good things about people, you’ll notice more good things about you too! And the more you do, the more your own self-esteem will grow.

10 Simple Tips To Attract The Best Clients.

Getting clients is easy, hard, fun, frustrating, energizing and enervating. Most of all, you never know what to expect — one day no one is saying yes and the next, you close five clients. Here are my ten top strategies I use every day to make clients knock on my door:

1. Communicate effectively with your potential client base.

You need a killer web site — not just one that sits there. It must actively reach out and grab prospects. So it will take a lot of work, but you'll see results immediately. In addition, design great business cards, brochures (sometimes), and a powerful 30-second talk about what you do.

2. Work with people smarter than yourself.

This has two angles:

1. If you don't know how to execute something critical for your business, hire someone. I know it will cost money, but most people think they can do it themselves. Result: it takes forever to build/implement, it's wrong, and then they ultimately hire someone to clean up the mess.
2. Get clients who add to your knowledge base — help them in one area, but be a knowledge vampire and suck out key strategies, tips, and avenues you will embed into your company.

3. Develop a networking relationship with your competitors.

I actively court coaches, while most of my counterparts are wary and shun theirs. Not only is it a 'good' thing to do (embrace everyone), but you find the differences between your vocations and allows you to give referrals to one another.

4. Create packages to meet your client’s needs.

The first time out of the gate, you usually have to guess what your clients requires — so you need to remain flexible and change your offerings slowly. Initially, I used to coach for an hour, but found the extra 15 minutes turned into a coffee klatch, so I shortened my sessions to 45 minutes. It's perfect — and if I really need extra time for an extra-special client, I have it.

5. Do pro-bono work for charitable organizations.

The bigger, the better. Not only does it position you in a wonderful light, it throws you into a mix of influencers who truly appreciate your skills. The more visibility you have, the more people know about you. In addition, always take on a number of pro-bono clients each month — it's just the right thing to do.

6. Write an eBook for your target market — and give it away.

You need to harness the knowledge/experience in your brain and spread it out into the marketplace. Most businesspeople tend to hoard it like a miser — successful people freely expose it to the world and clients come banging at their door. It doesn't have to be long — just put a few powerful ideas in a short article, give it a snappy title, and offer it for free on your site. Also, have copies made and hand it to anyone who breathes.

7. Set Up “Power Meetings”.

Master the act of  networking with the right people. Most men and women tend to meet with anyone — you'll quickly find out there are many 'time-wasters' who might be fun initially, but in the end, suck valuable money from your pockets (time is money). You know who your target market is (if you don't, call me) — chase and connect with them.

8. Work at least two hours a day to get clients.

"Rich are you crazy?" No, I'm not. You should be meeting, setting up lunches, expanding your website, talking on the phone and a myriad of other strategies to get clients. My motto — if business is good, slowly power down your marketing. If business is bad, rocket up your marketing. But always find at least two hours a day to keep your client pipeline full and healthy.

9. Master the cold call approach.

Face it — ultimately you will need to reach out to strangers to get the business you want. Don't procrastinate and never do it — learn how to reach out to key targets, entice them, and get in front of them. If you do your homework, for every strikeout you will hit a home run (and sometimes a grand slam), trust me.

10. MCA - take massive action.

MCA stands for Massive Client Acquisition — the state of mind where you need to target, hunt, and capture large swaths of your client base. Take the necessary steps to grow your clientele — get out and network, reach out via a killer website, thrill people with your abilities, give away your intellectual capital, wear huge holes in your shoes, and lose your voice from all the talking you will do.

Bottom line: Think like a salesperson — you need to get up every day and get your butt out the door. Stop putting distance between you and your prospects — close the gap and you'll have to begin turning them away.

What else do you do to get clients? If you've tried any of these tools, how did they work?

Image provided by Marjorie Lipan at Flickr.

Best Companies: John Neeman Tools.

In 2013, I will be highlighting many old and new companies who embrace 21st century progress and run their businesses differently from the old guard who are quickly dying off. My first is John Neeman Tools. They are a small crew of craftsmen from Latvia who use their heritage of craftsmanship handed down through many generations to design and create woodworking tools. Their process, their method and mission, keeps these traditions and crafts alive and well. In this high-tech age, their traditional craftsmanship is flourishing.

John Neeman Tools is founded by Jacob - a carpenter with love for traditional woodworking and his friend – a village bladesmith. This bond has created a premier company.

They use their hands to produce tools that will live on, to tell their story in the hands of the craftsmen after us. Each tool they make is born with energy and personality – a love and care that will be felt daily by each craftsman, a resonance from the heart of the tool.

Towering factories and belching chimneys are not their game. All of their tools are made in our small traditional workshops using equally traditional methods and techniques. Their focus is on uniqueness and quality, not quantity. They want to help people to remember how to use their hands, to relate their own human energy to their tools – to achieve the true joy of creating something from humble beginnings.

You can learn more about John Neeman Tools and their products here.

5 Powerful Lessons From My Vacation - Part Two.

I didn't expect to write this post. But my last post, 5 Powerful Lessons From My Vacation, garnered so many comments with suggestions of other powerful lessons . . . I just had to do a Part Two to share my readers comments with you! So without further ado . . . here are my second five lessons: 

6. Engage With New People

Tracy from my Executive Coaching group related: "One of the things I love to do is to engage with people I meet meaningfully, for example in cafes and businesses that I use. I have found the investment of time and interest in others has rewarded me hugely in feeling joyful. Don't lose the feeling and save some you, for you. Thanks for sharing such a great time."

Tracy is absolutely right - many times I had the opportunity to interact with many different people during my vacation. Since I am a slight extrovert, I tend to ask questions of people to get them talking. And I had many WONDERFUL conversations!

7. Connect With Nature

Diane from my Executive Coaching group: "I'd like to add one thing to your list, which I think you realized on the farm without saying it - connecting with nature. Nothing helps put things in perspective for you, or brings awareness to yourself, your surroundings and your connectedness with all things than being outdoors. For me, it's the north shores of Lake Superior that completely humbles me." :-)

I love how Diane simply states the obvious - take the time to notice nature - and the benefits are endless.

Also, my good friend BJ said: "Great Post Rich. Vacations are essential. Even my short trip to VT did wonders! Don't have to be an long or exotic to be mind adjusting."

8. Recapture Your Childhood

Gary from a Dale Carnegie group exclaimed: "Having just returned from a week in Mexico with my family where I turned off my phone and threw it in the hotel safe, I fully agree with your five epiphanies. I also learned that it's possible to zip-line upside down. What a rush!"

When was the last time you got permission to act like a kid? Not only is it fun — it energizes you and brings back all the playfulness of your younger years. In addition, it opens up your mind to all the possibilities (like a kid) and eliminates all of the obstacles we put in our way (like an adult).

9. Gain Self Confidence

Tom from my Entrepreneur team gave me a great quote: "Don’t put yourself on sale. This is my favorite mantra from financial guru Suze Orman. While Suze’s target audience is directed to women, the advice applies to everyone. When you skip vacations, you put yourself on sale. If you have 2-weeks of paid vacation and don’t use them, you’re essentially working for free. By committing to a vacation, you declare to yourself (and to others) that you are important and deserve dedicated time for yourself."

Tom - you are spot on target! So many people don't take the requisite time off and in the end, they suffer for it. If you don't declare that you are important, who will? When I let all of my clients know about my impending vacation, they were overjoyed to hear I will be taking time off and heartily wished me a great time. What a great send off to get!

10. Impact People You Meet

Steve's comment (from my Bulletproof Your Career club) threw me for a loop: "You get out of your social and professional circles. You are thrust into other spheres, worlds, and situations normally not encountered with your day t0 day meanderings. And when you bump into these people - they also bump into you and most of the time - are blown away with what YOU bring to the table."

When you're on vacation - you are bumping into a lot of people. People who you can affect — make their day better, get them up when their down, teach them something they may not know, or best of all — touch their soul.

I CAN'T SAY THIS ENOUGH: If you haven’t gone on vacation — GO. You can afford the time away from work. 

5 Powerful Lessons From My Vacation.

I took 10 days off over the past week for a much needed vacation for me and my family. We made our way down to Maryland's eastern shore (to a family farm) and then made our way to visit Washington DC. Even though I was relaxing, I had a lot of time during our travels to think about what I learned during my vacation:

1. I disconnected from my practice.

I came back to 500+ emails — but I made sure prior to my vacation, to let all of my clients, colleagues and friends know I'd be gone and if they really needed to reach me, to call. No one called. The time away from email was energizing. Knowing every day that I could just get up and go for a swim, or a walk, or just sit and read gave me real clarity and focus.

It gave me the permission to clear out the cobwebs and focus on what really important — personally and professionally.

2. I watched people.

My disconnection allowed me to watch and engage people from all walks of life. It allowed me to see really bad service and really exceptional service during my time on the road. It

I walked around with a new sense of wonder — engaging people and asking them questions — how's your day going, what's it like to work here, do they ever see anyone famous, etc. It's amazing how animated people get when they someone takes a sincere interest in their life.

3. I built deeper connections with the people I love.

One of the most important things I did was to spend time with my family — my wife and two sons (ages 11 and 16). We had a lot of fun relaxing at the farm and then sightseeing in DC. My two favorites — seeing my 16 year old son act as tour guide while we were in DC (I was so proud) and my 11 year old son have so much fun cutting down bamboo at the farm (he is a dedicated Mythbusters fan and will tackle any project with aplomb).

In addition, I spent quality time with my life partner. She and I have known each other for over 33 years (married 22) and still learn new aspects of one another every day. This vacation grew us closer together.

4. I had time to learn.

I spent a portion of my time reading and enjoying books. I also engaged with my older brother, his wife and sons and learned a host of new things about the world around me. We didn't talk business — we talked more about the world and philosophy in general. When was the last time you did that?

5. I recharged my batteries.

Let me state — I was not 'powered-down' and in need of energy. I was okay — I was moving along just fine over the past eight months. But it's like hooking you up to a powerful energy source (as in The Avengers movie, during the fight between Iron Man and Thor - Thor hit Iron Man with a huge bolt of lightning - and suddenly, Iron Man's energy potential shot upwards of 400%).

It really got my mind working in higher gears and began to build up a reserve of energy to take me through the end of 2012. I am full of ideas and direction — stay tuned!

If you haven't gone on vacation — GO. You can afford the time away from work.

The Power of Connecting With People.

I finally had breakfast with my new and good friend, Eric Rochow. Eric hosts one of the biggest Podcasts on iTunes, call GardenFork. I invited him a number of weeks ago to breakfast. Now the funny thing is, I don't know Eric. And Eric didn't know me.

When I first started to listen to Eric, I found out he lives in Brooklyn, NY during the week and then makes his way to his farmhouse in Colebrook, CT. I could easily identify with him because I have a rural country house in Oxford, CT.

One day, I ran a quick Google Map to find out the best route for Eric to drive from Brooklyn to Colebrook. And guess what? It went right by where I live, on the Connecticut interstate highway named I-84.

So I reached out to Eric by writing him a email, told him how much I appreciate his podcast, and offered to buy him breakfast on one of his sojourns up to his country home. It took a little while, but he responded back via Twitter — he not only accepted my offer, but was impressed with my site and what I do!

In addition, he invited me onto his show to talk about careers, business, time management, gardens, and generators. Click here.

So we finally had breakfast at the incredible Laurel Diner, located in Southbury, CT. We really enjoyed the conversation, the food, and to top it all off . . . Eric interviewed me again! Click here.

So the moral of this story is . . . if you want to meet someone — reach out and make it happen!

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. Having a hard time meeting important people? Let’s talk. I’ve coached thousands to step up their presentation game — call or email me to schedule a free session.

Why Lunches Are Good For Your Career.

Today's Thursday!Rush to work — get in — check your email — check your voicemail — and run off to your status meetings.

WORK. WORK. WORK. WORK. WORK.

Next thing you know, it's 6 PM and you're wondering where the day went.

I want you to make a change today. Take just one of the 10-12 hours spent at work and GO TO LUNCH.

Not at your desk. Not in your cafeteria. Not with anyone you currently work with.

Have lunch with someone new. Someone that energizes you. Someone that will get you to think out of the box. Someone that might get you to consider making a bold career move.

WHY? Because it's good for your CAREER. Meeting new and interesting people: Gets your mental energy moving. Grows your professional network. Allows you to search for future talent (so you don't have to work with those pesky people in HR). Allows potential management to look at you as possible future talent (that's always good to have under your belt).

And frankly, your work won't suffer one iota.

You need to do this more often. Why not the present?

Call that one person right now and make that lunch date. Do it. You'll thank me.

How To Become Unfireable – Part Seven: Be A Billboard.

In addition to coaching a full practice of clients, my Mentor Coach Bootcamps started this week (say goodbye to Monday nights). So the 'production' end of my business is ‘full-steam ahead’. I also jumped out of bed every morning over the past two weeks (4:30 AM) to attend various networking/sales meetings to spread the word of the Rich Gee.

And I gave a major presentation to 150+ executives about how to market themselves. It was a big hit for me – most attendees gave me a 4 to 5 rating (on a scale of 1-5).

So the ‘development’ end of my business was in full gear too. What did it deliver? I received an avalanche of interest in my coaching and my phone has been off the hook. In addition, my site numbers are through the roof and I have a pack of new business cards that can choke a horse (all to enter today into my contact list for eBlasts).

Why am I telling you all this? Not to brag — but to illustrate how to grow from knowing a lot of people into a person a lot of people KNOW ABOUT.

You are the product – get others to meet you, talk with you, experience you. “Take you out for a test drive” as I call it.

People need to see you, experience you, to see what you’re working on. They need to hear three things:

#1 What you’ve done.

This is your reputation - you need to advertise it. Don’t think people just know about it. That’s the mistake most executives make — they think their work speaks for them forever.

Don’t kid yourself. After the project is over, the major rollout complete, the client captured . . . people forget. Quickly.

You need to remind them frequently of your past successes. Not blatantly, but in general conversation. Mention how you worked with Tom when you rolled out that spectacular initiative or when Susan helped you lock in one of your biggest clients. Misdirect with someone else and then bring it back to you.

#2 What you’re doing.

People need to know the level of caliber they’re working with and you need to let them know the high-level and high-impact stuff you’re managing.

The secret ingredient: if you have to let people know what you’re working on, you’ll tend to focus on higher exposure projects. It’s like a class reunion, 3-6 months beforehand, you lose weight, get that liposuction done you’ve been putting off, and hit those wrinkles with botox.

I want you to do the same thing with your career. If you aren’t working on the high-priority projects — make sure you are.

#3 What you’re gonna do.

This is how you predict great opportunities for your career. When you’re out there, you’re finding out about what’s in store for the company, the industry, and everyone around you.

The most connected executives are actively letting key people know their ideas, strategies, and plans. They brainstorm at lunch, ask for ideas after work, and delve deeper with the management team over drinks.

The more you are a billboard and let the right people see what you’ve done, what you are doing today, and what you plan to do . . . the more high-level projects, positions, and promotions come your way.

Now go out there and let them see your billboard up in lights!

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. Need to figure out how to be a billboard? Let's talk. This is one of the main areas I tackle first with all of my clients. If you’re not a client . . . grab your spot now before all the final spot for October is taken. Only one left — time is getting short.

How To Become Unfireable – Part Six: It's Who You Know.

Here’s the cold, hard truth:  

You not only have to have a lot of friends, you need get out there and meet new people, Period. End of story.

If you don’t want to do that — you will be expendable.

But most people don’t like to ‘network’. Well then . . . don’t. Connect.

In my opinion, the clear difference between Networking and Connecting is:

Networking: What can you do for me?
Connecting: What can I do for you?

It's my definition, my differentiation, and here's why I don't like networking:

• It's all me, me, me.
• It's the clammy science of collecting business cards ad infinitum, of cold-calling strangers to grill them about possible openings or beg them for a favor.
• When most people don't like networking, it's because of the slimy nature of glad-handing strangers and constantly asking for something.
• It's impersonal, it takes the average executive or entrepreneur way out of their comfort zone.
• I know when I meet someone and they network with me — I immediately see through their facade and want to get out of there ASAP.
• To the best of my knowledge, no one likes to be 'networked' to.
• Networking is awkward, it's artificial, and more often than not, it doesn't work that well.

Connecting is different.

• It's noticing people, schmoozing with them, keeping in touch with them — and benefiting from them. You connect with people in a mutually productive and pleasurable way.
• You concentrate on the other person. Try to ask questions, minimize your blabbering, and listen to their answers.
• You build a solid relationship and try to connect with them on many levels.
• Instead of selling, you're seeding. You plant the seed of your capabilities, service, or product but you don't overtly go for the kill.
• You build the relationship to do something for them. To help them professionally or personally. It might be an article they are interested in, a piece of information, or even an introduction to someone you know.
• In the end, the relationship supersedes the sale. Every time.

So how do you connect? Here are the steps:

1. Be inquisitive. Ask a lot of questions and follow up questions. See below for the process.
2. If they ask about you, answer their questions, but don't go on. You need to focus on them.
3. Try to find a way to connect with them — find a common place to share — maybe a location, a school, a business, a friend, something.
4. Ask follow up questions, "You live in Stamford? What part? High Ridge Road? I grew up near Rippowam High School!".
5. Once you make the 'connection', you begin to build a rapport of trust between you and the person your connecting with.
6. Each subsequent question, follow-up question, and connection will build a stronger friendship bond between you.
7. When concluding the conversation or meeting, try to ensure you have some sort of deliverable or to-do for the person. It might be an article, a web site, an acquaintance you might know — to give to them at a later date. Do something for them – Givers Gain.
8. Ensure you do what you say you're going to do.

What is the process to connect? Read this story:

"You are in front of a big, white home. You look down and see the mailbox, you look up and see your whole family waving to you, leaning out the top windows of the house. You look over and see a beautifully, ornate chimney with a huge, yellow, leather work glove sitting upon it with all five finger pointing in the air. The glove is holding an old, wooden tennis racket and a bi-plane (like the one Snoopy flies) breaks through the strings of the racket, flys around your high school, comes to a soft landing on your football field and touches the goal post."

This story is a mnemonic. It teaches you how to connect with someone by encapsulating key questions within an inane, weird story you'll remember. Let me break it down:

• Mailbox - Hi, my name is Rich Gee. What's your name? Where do you live? What part of Wilton?
• Family waving to you - Are you married? Do you have kids? (if they say no, don't feel uncomfortable, just say, "Boy are you lucky!"
• Huge leather work glove - What do you do? Where do you work? What is it like to work there?
• Wooden tennis racket - What do you do for fun? What are your interests?
• Bi-plane - Do you travel for business? Did you go on vacation this summer?
• High school - Where did you go to school?
• Football field - What sports are you into?
• Goal post - What goals are you shooting for this year?

All I ask is that you try it. I used to do it all the time waiting for my daily train to work. Standing next to someone, I would say something witty ("Seems like the train gets later every day as it gets colder."), get them to smile, and then introduce myself. The hint with each question is to be enthusiastic and use many follow up questions. Be inquisitive and have fun!

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. If you're having problems connecting with people, let's talk. This is one of the main areas I tackle first with all of my business clients. If you’re not a client . . . grab your spot now before all the spots for October are taken. Time is getting short.

"What would you think if I sang out of tune?"

"What would you think if I sang out of tune,Would you stand up and walk out on me? Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song, And I'll try not to sing out of key. Oh I get by with a little help from my friends." - With a Little Help from My Friends - Lennon/McCartney

Yesterday was a powerful day for me. Thursday is my networking day and I met over 100 people starting at 6:00 AM all the way to 8:00 PM. A long day.

But I was energized when I got home.

Here's a quick synopsis:

5-6 AM - Commute (beat the traffic!) 6-7 AM - Blog at Starbucks, meet new people. 7-9 AM - BNI Networking Meeting - My Sales Force. 9-11 AM - Catchup Meeting with an influential force in Finance. 11-2 PM - Lunch and Brainstorming meeting with a future partner. 2-4 PM - Meeting with a new colleague - helping with his job situation. 4-6 PM - Mastermind/Networking Group - a great time was had by all. 6-8 PM - Client's Grand Re-Opening Celebration - lots of networking. 8-9 PM - Commute home (listen to motivational audiobooks).

I made a lot of new friends and deepened relationships with many current ones.

Bottom line — this is the life-blood of my business and career.

An esteemed colleague quoted Michael Gerber last night, "Most entrepreneurs fail because you are working IN your business rather than ON your business." He couldn't be more correct.

I came home last night with a pile of new business cards, a bunch of referral slips, and a small list of to-do's to get out by the end of the day today.

I made new friends. I deepened relationships with current friends. And I hope I helped a few people along the way.

That's the profession I've chosen — and I love it every single day.

What do you do to make new friends during the work-week?

Top 10 Best Business Rules.

Over the past 10 years of coaching (and 20 years in corporate management), a lot of key knowledge, information, and ideas pass over my desk. Candidly, most of it is a blur. But there are some ideas, certain quotes, and golden rules that tend to stay true and strong in my professional life (and my coaching). So I thought I would write them down and make a list to start off the week:

1. "If you want to be successful, you have to build a ladder rung by rung.  There are no shortcuts."

There are a lot of people out there looking for a silver bullet. And there are a lot of people who promise instant success. My experience over the past 30 years — it takes hard work and a certain amount of time to build something that really matters and delivers true revenue.

2. "Don't waste your time on jealousy."

This is a big one — I can't tell you how many people I've run into in corporate and in the business world who thrive on cattiness and gossip. Although I totally understand competition to drive you and I, I don't understand how it evolves into its addictive cousin, jealousy. It will distract and poison your personality.

3. "Stop being the "YES" person."

You can't walk down the hall without running into one of these. As a peer, they are so easy to spot — they tend to manipulate their superiors by delivering whatever pablum is needed to sustain their vicious life-force. Unfortunately, as a boss, it's hard to differentiate between someone who actually believes in you and someone who is just shoveling more manure.

4. "No matter how bad a situation you are in, remember, it could have been worse."

I love this one. I want you to brand this in your brain the next time something dreadful happens. Instead of focusing on the negativity of the current situation you are in, take a few minutes and realize it probably could have been much worse. You'll find after doing this exercise, a lot of your guilt has washed away and you can now focus on the problem at hand (and fix it!).

5. "Surround yourself with the right people: staff, mentors, colleagues, etc. People make all the difference."

It's not what you know - it's who you know. Go out there and double your connections this year. People are currency in any marketplace.

6. "Don't believe everything you hear."

WOW. I can't tell you how many clients come to me every day with prognostications about the economy, their industry, their competitors, and so-called experts who spin fear to get you to buy their latest 'Sham-Wow'. Take everything with a grain of salt — think about it and really try to understand it — usually it's full of hooey.

7. "The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your arm."

Only YOU can change your situation. Yes, I know you should rely on outside help, friends, and colleagues to make things happen. But when the chips are down and you definitely need things to happen — it's always up to you to start the process.

8. "The way it's always been done isn't always the way to do it."

If I had a dollar for every time I heard, "That isn't the way we do things around here.", I would be living on a lush, tropical island. Corporate drones thrive on the absence of change — and your job (if you choose to accept it) is to prove them wrong. It's the only way everyone moves up and the company evolves.

9. "If everyone likes you, you're probably boring."

I love this one — my mother told me this a long time ago. If everyone likes you, you probably aren't rocking the boat, taking chances, and embracing risk in your life and relationships. Don't strive for the status quo, add a little pizzazz to everything you do and everyone you meet. You'll thank me (and my Mom).

10. "Work smarter, not longer."

If you work with me, this is Rich Gee's Golden Rule. And the funny thing, when I first say it to new clients, they think I'm crazy. They point me to #1 on this list and say "we have to work hard". I totally agree — you have to work hard and SMART. Figure out ways to streamline, delegate, and retire everything you do. Work on the important stuff and get rid of the fluff we like to consume our workday.

What other great pieces of advice guide your professional life?

Image provided by Solo at Flickr.

Serendipity With The Apple Store.

Something wonderful happened to me yesterday. Well, let me start from the beginning — I wanted to get the new iPad. Badly.

In fact, I gave up all Christmas & Birthday presents to save up for one. So I was primed to get the iPad2 once I heard that the new release was slated for March.

When the iPad came out on Friday, my family and I traveled to the closest mall to see if we can see one (and secretly get one!).

You've probably heard — the lines wrapped throughout the mall — hundreds of people waiting for hours. We never got to even enter the store. I went home thinking we would show up the next day (when the lines went down) to pick one up. Guess what — all stores were totally sold out.

What I forgot to add is that I made a quick phone call to my good friends, the business managers at the Apple Store, prior to all of this technology hoopla. I asked them, "If the iPad came in, could they hold one for me?". I then proceeded to forget about this call after hearing the pent-up demand and 'no inventory' news.

One quick detour to talk more about the Apple Business Managers. They're the BEST. As a successful entrepreneur, I need a flawless technology platform. The Apple Store does it for me. They go out of their way to make any purchase (I have four MacBook Pros, two iMacs, three iPhones, and about twelve iPods, iTouches, Nanos, and Shuffles hanging around the office and home). Whenever ANYTHING goes wrong, they have impeccable client service that is available and flawless. I LOVE going to the Apple Store.

Now back to yesterday. I was at Pepe's Pizza, hosting my son Andrew's 10th birthday party with a gaggle of kids. I get a call from my one of the Apple business managers — not only has he saved an iPad for me from a secret shipment that he received this morning, he also will give me a discount on my purchase.

WOW. I ran down to the store and picked it up. It's beautiful.

Why am I telling you this story? It's based on all the business I sent the way of this business manager. And many of my friends, colleagues, clients, and acquaintances that I've also sent to that particular Apple Store.

It's called developing deep connections with key people in your business circle. Seeing how you can help THEM — how you can build their business. Always asking, "How Can I Help You?" (see my last post)

Most people don't do it — and they are the ones waiting in line for an iPad.

Has this ever happened to you? How did it make you feel? Do you now deepen your business relationships?

How To Become Genuinely Interested In People.

I know . . . you hate small talk. To a certain extent, everyone does. If you’re asked to attend a lunch or dinner, you think, “Shoot me now - I hate all the fake conversation”.

People ask me why I love social functions. They grow me as a professional, expand my contact base and increase my chances for greater success. Hermits are rarely successful (with the exception of Howard Hughes).

A close colleague of mine is the most active person I've ever met. She spends every second of the day seeking new and interesting experiences. As a result, she finds what other people do interesting because it can be applied to her own endeavors.

It's not about talking to people. It's about being interested in what other people have to say, and the only way to do that is to be interested in things yourself. If you are a boring person then you will find other people boring.

You might be uncomfortable in social situations and use your ‘disinterest’ as an excuse, whether by accident or on purpose.

There are many reasons why you don't find people interesting. Sometimes, people also fall victim to the same arrogance to assume people will be dumb and boring to talk to. Don’t believe it, reach out and give it a try.

Find as many things in the world as you can that interest you. Then when the opportunity arises, try to find related topics to discuss with strangers.

The deeper and more honest a conversation is with a stranger, the more interesting it will be. Don't be afraid to tell someone what it is that you really enjoy or are really thinking about. They will sense your passion and share more with you.

If you get caught up in the moral dilemma of whether or not you are having a conversation for the other person's pleasure or your own selfish desires, then just remember we're here to experience life with others. We are all the same.

I've had more lifelong friends by volunteering for events or projects that I've found interesting than I ever did through chance and happenstance.

I volunteered for a local community project and while there were a fair share of douchey people involved, they were far outnumbered by just plainly awesome folks, most of whom I am still involved with on a day-to-day basis.

Keep your eyes open for opportunities to help others do things you enjoy, and you'll find others with common ground and shared interests that you will, hopefully, have no need to follow conversational flowcharts. You'll just talk.

Make believe you are a spy. Pretend you are James Bond and you are collecting information. You need to get as much intel on someone as possible, and learn as much as you can. And you need to store it away incase you need to use it to keep your cover later.

Don't spend time thinking about yourself and the process of fake communication rather than engaging in a real conversation. A conversation is a dance, a give and take, an exchange. Try to relate yourself with the person you are talking to, which in turn will make you more interested, because clearly we are very interested in ourselves.

Addressing it in a slightly different manner was all I needed to get much better at it, which in turn made people seem more interesting.

What are your tips to produce great conversation?

Image provided by atomicjeep at Flickr.

Are You A Super-Connector?

Keith Ferrazzi uses a term in his book, Never Eat Alone, called the 'Super Connector'. His definition (paraphrased from his book & site):

"Super Connectors are people who maintain contact with thousands of people in many different worlds and know them well enough to give them a call. Restauranteurs, headhunters, lobbyists, fundraisers, public relations people, politicians, and journalists are the best super-connectors because it's their job to know EVERYONE."

If you want to rocket your career upwards or grow your business exponentially, you need to begin reaching out to these people, become friends, and leverage their talents. I do . . . all the time.

But just knowing a lot of people or knowing the 'right' type of people is only one side of the coin. The other side is how you help connect them to each other — 'get your connections to connect with other connections'.

This is where the rubber hits the road — and where most people stop being connectors. They don't want to volunteer their good friends, colleagues, and clients to other connections. Why? It might not go well, people are very concerned about their time, they might not like the person you connect them to — it could go in a million bad directions.

In addition, we tend to hold onto our connections like a deep, dark secret, never letting anyone know who we know. Guess what? You are sabotaging your own evolution to become a super-connector. If you don't share, the natural symbiosis of contacts never happens.

Here's a simple tool I use to not only connect strangers together, but it ensures both parties immediately connect with one another and if something goes awry, no feelings are hurt. I call it the RICH GEE VIRTUAL INTRODUCTION. Here it is:

Oprah & Phil - I think you both should meet. Why?

Oprah - Phil is a good friend and a rare personality in the world. He's helped many celebrities just like you and his name came to mind when you mentioned your situation with the beef industry.

Phil - Oprah is also a good friend. She has a multi-billion dollar media enterprise and she influences millions of people every day. She makes things happen.

From my point of view, it never hurts to introduce respected professionals - you never know who can help who, who knows who, etc. I love to have these encounters myself all the time. No one is selling anything, no one is looking for a job - the result: good business and marketplace conversation! You never know, you might help one another!

Oprah Position, Company

Address, City/State/Zip

Direct Phone Number

Email

Phil Position, Company

Address, City/State/Zip

Direct Phone Number

Email

If I have erred in any way, let me know. I have introduced you to each other with the highest of ethics and earnestness. You are both nice people and I like to make opportunities happen between friends and colleagues.

Have a great day! Regards - Rich

I've probably used this template thousands of times in my corporate and coaching career. Guess what? It's NEVER backfired — no one ever got their feelings hurt — no one ever called their lawyers.

Try it — one day (in the very near future) you might become a super connector too!