You're Going To HATE What I Have To Say.

"I'm Going To Change Your Life In One Easy Step!" I get emails like this all the time. Personalities who say they will radically change your life instantly. All you have to do is believe (and spend $195, $795, 0r $8995) and you will get the secret to the riches of the universe without lifting a finger.

I just received another one today:  "Rewire your mindset to become unbeatable!" "Grow your financial fortune!" "Get ultra-fit and feel better than ever before!" "Achieve all the goals you never could achieve before!"

It's magic! And if you send them your money, they will change your life! Of course, they are highly successful, jetting around the world, filming videos in really cool places. So they must know the secret!

I get together with a number of high-level coaches each month and we are a bit perplexed with the success of these people who sell 21st century snake oil. Don't people get it? Here are some immutable rules of life:

  1. Change doesn't happen overnight. It took you a long time to get where you are and it will take a little bit of determined work to get you where you want to be. Yes, you can 'change your mindset' — but the journey will be long, hard, and you will have to gird yourself against falling back into old routines.
  2. You won't make seven figures right out of the gate. Unless you have a foolproof hair-growth formula (I'll buy it), incremental gains will only occur if you make the right decisions, at the right time, and deliver a powerful product/service that a lot of people see and want to buy.
  3. You won't look like Ryan Gosling instantly. I don't know what 'ultra-fit' means, but after speaking with my personal trainer, it takes months/years to get (and stay) 'ultra-fit'.

Here's my 'secret' prescription for change:

  • You need a roadmap. If you don't know where you are and where you want to go, you're going to fail. You also need a step-by-step plan of tasks and activities to get you there.
  • You will need to focus. Don't get distracted by shiny objects — it will be hard to stay on track and not veer off into uncharted territory where you might get demotivated.
  • You are going to test your limits of confidence and work. It's going to be hard at times — you will have to push yourself more than you ever have before.
  • You are going to have to be open to change a few key things in your life. Bad habits and decisions are hard to break — you have to chart a new course and stay on it.
  • You are going to make many mistakes along the way. It's a fact of business — take chances and you might fail. It's how you stand up and keep going.
  • You are going to have to make a LOT of new friends. You have to reach out farther than you ever have before — meet people who are scary — make hundreds of new friends.
  • You need a little luck. Yes, luck. Luck appears when you open yourself up to new opportunities, options, and friends. And you cast away bad habits and procrastination.

Think of the new successful tier of business - Tim Cook (Apple), Brin & Page (Google), Jeff Bezos (Amazon), Mark Zuckerberg (Facebook), Jack Ma (Alibaba), etc. They all have and currently work quite hard at their roles to get and stay where they are today. Want to be highly successful? Want to be a star? You have to work it.

"There's no such thing as a free lunch."

Why You Don't Meet People For Lunch.

You're too busy for lunch. We're all busy — you might have time management or delegation issues. Or you can't say 'NO'. It takes too much time. No it doesn't — and I'll show you a way to make it much shorter.

I wouldn't know what to talk about. You shouldn't talk — ask lots of questions and LISTEN.

I hate people. Okay — you got me there. Move to a far-away land and live like a hermit.

To have a healthy business or career, you should be meeting someone for lunch at least once a week (if not more). That's 52 new or strengthened relationships built in a year. Connecting with people bring new ideas, new strategies, and new energy to your mind and body. It's an essential part of the business cycle. But for some reason, you don't do it.

Sometimes going out to lunch takes too much time:

  • Closing up what your doing, getting on your coat and exiting your building - 10 minutes
  • Traveling to the lunch location - 10-20 minutes
  • Arriving early - 10 minutes
  • Lunch - 60-90 minutes
  • Traveling from the lunch location - 10-20 minutes
  • Entering your office, coat off, getting settled, and back to what you were doing - 10 minutes

All totaled, we're talking 110-160 minutes — virtually 2-3 hours out of your workday. Now some people would say (like me), "It's part of the job and I have to schedule around it." But most people will say, "Candidly, I don't have 2-3 hours to waste out of my workday." AND THEY NEVER HAVE ANOTHER BUSINESS LUNCH.

I've solved that problem. Don't have that lunch.

Instead, I call people in the morning. Every day, I pick two people who I want to call to touch base and see how they're doing. What do I do?

  • I make sure I catch them at a weird time - 7:30 AM or 5:30 PM. I call when they don't expect it.
  • I keep it REALLY short - no more than 10 minutes.
  • I energize my voice and keep the tone and rhythm to keep their attention.
  • I keep the call all about them - I ask questions, listen, follow up with more questions.
  • I add humor, anecdotes, or anything I can think of to make my call FUN.
  • I then say, "I've taken too much of your time, let me let you go..."
  • I end with an intention, "Let's connect again in a few months..."
  • And then I hang up. 

Bang! Connected with a colleague in 10 minutes. They feel good about you — you feel good about them — and you've refreshed your relationship with a past friend, colleague, or client. It's SO easy. When you call them again in 3-6 months, they will be happy to receive your call because it will be short and energize their day. THEY WILL WANT TO TALK WITH YOU!

Here's the best part — if you work 250 days a year, you can connect with over 500 people. Think of the possibilities!

Try it — my charge to you this morning is to reach out to two people and talk with them for no more than 10 minutes. You will find it so easy to do. And it works!

P.S. Here's the REAL reason I do it — they feel good about you, they remember you . . . and they recommend you. My business is BOOMING!