Be Like Jack LaLanne.

I grew up with Jack LaLanne. I used to watch him, his wife Elaine (yes, Elaine LaLanne), and his German shepherd Happy every morning on TV. Jack taught me a lot of things about life — especially to stay positive all the time.

Why be like Jack? You might know him from his juicer — but he was so much more.

1. Make a bold change.

At 15, he was a wreck — sickly, skinny, and eating all the wrong foods. He realized it was a dead-end and radically changed his diet, behavior, and focus. Where can you make a bold change in your life?

2. Break the mold.

Up until Jack LaLanne, gyms were for men who wanted to box or wrestle. Jack opened the prototype for the fitness spas to come — a gym, juice bar, and health food store. What antiquated molds need breaking?

3. Keep true to your vision (and yourself).

Jack said, “People thought I was a charlatan and a nut. The doctors were against me — they said that working out with weights would give people heart attacks and they would lose their sex drive.” Never ask permission - get out and do it.

4. Think BIG.

Jack then took his idea national — “The Jack LaLanne Show” made its debut in 1951 as a local program in the San Francisco area, then went nationwide on daytime television in 1959. Pick a big dream and take one step closer to it today.

5. Speak to your audience — all the time.

“My show was so personal, I made it feel like you and I were the only ones there. And I’d say: ‘Boys and girls, come here. Uncle Jack wants to tell you something. You go get Mother or Daddy, Grandmother, Grandfather, whoever is in the house. You go get them, and you make sure they exercise with me.’ ” Learn how to better communicate to key people.

6. Keep it simple.

Most of his exercises on TV were done with a chair or broomstick. Don’t over-complexify your life - simplify!

7. Keep fresh with new ideas and offerings.

He invented the forerunners of modern exercise machines like leg extension and pulley devices. He marketed a Power Juicer to blend raw vegetables and fruits and a Glamour Stretcher cord, and he sold exercise videos and fitness books. When was the last time you read a good book?

8. Know when to get out.

Expanding on his television popularity, he opened dozens of fitness studios under his name, later licensing them to Bally. If it isn’t working for you - run away.

9. Be a showoff.

At 60 he swam from Alcatraz Island to Fisherman’s Wharf handcuffed, shackled, and towing a 1,000-pound boat. At 70, handcuffed and shackled again, he towed 70 boats, carrying a total of 70 people, a mile and a half through Long Beach Harbor. Be assertive in all that you do.

10. Walk the talk.

He ate two meals a day and shunned snacks. Breakfast, following his morning workout, usually included several hard-boiled egg whites, a cup of broth, oatmeal with soy milk, and seasonal fruit. For dinner,  a salad with raw vegetables and egg whites along with fish — often salmon — and a mixture of red and white wine. He never drank coffee. Be authentic to everyone you meet.

11. Stay positive — all the time.

He brimmed with optimism and restated a host of aphorisms for an active and fit life. “I can’t die,” he most famously liked to say. “It would ruin my image.” SMILE!

Jack passed away 10 years ago at the ripe old age of 96. He brought a lot of energy, motivation, and happiness to millions of people. I hope someday, I can do that too.

The Importance Of Playing Tennis With Better Tennis Players.

"It's better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates whose behavior is better than yours and you'll drift in that direction." - Warren Buffett

Have you ever played tennis?

• Play with someone worse than you, you won’t push yourself at all and play at a much lower level than you usually do. You’ll coast.

• Play with an equal player, I promise your game will be boring as hell. Back and forth, you get one point, they get one point. BORING.

• Play with a better player and you'll be forced to play a better game. You’ll have to move faster, anticipate their moves, and push yourself harder than you ever have before.

Think of all the highly successful business people you know, whom do they hang around with? Who do they have lunch with? Why do you think they do that?

Because they play a better game. The easiest way for an adult to learn is to mimic other adults actions and behaviors. It could be a very apparent behavior or a very subtle action. But these cues are picked up (just like in tennis) and are absorbed.

So today, you need to play a better game. Hang with the big boys and girls. Watch what they do, how they react, how they take action. Set up that lunch, make that appointment, hire that new rising star — it’s time you play your ‘A’ game.

You might surprise yourself and serve that ace.

What To Do When Life Hits You Square In The Face.

Ever have a REALLY bad day? One that really SUCKS? Did you lose your biggest client in an instant? Or did you get dressed down by your boss for doing something stupid (and you thought it was brilliant)?

We all have those days. As Rocky Balboa said, "But it ain't about how hard you get hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward."

Unfortunately, when you do get hit, you might find yourself wallowing in self pity. You might even be in one of Kübler-Ross' 5 Stages of Grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance).

Here's how I deal with it — I call it my "3 Stages of Success":

Stage 1 - Frustration

Not angry, just frustrated. Something (or someone) kicks you HARD out of control and you find yourself wheeling emotionally.

You question your worth. You start backtracking all of your actions. Add in a healthy scoop of emotions and your are downright FRUSTRATED.

Stage 2 - Reality Check

Stop the emotions for a second and let's do a quick reality check. Let's look at your situation logically — what REALLY happened? Is it the end of the world? Can you quickly recover?

Let's level-set our thinking and try to understand what happened and what we can do.

Stage 3 - Competitive Spirit

Now that you've thought logically about your situation and have come up with alternative strategies to move forward, let's access your competitive spirit.

You might say, "ARE YOU KIDDING RICH? I just got over being frustrated!" Let me be clear — you need to access your competitive spirit to move forward, take action, and never let this happen to you again. Some ideas:

What can you do right NOW? New plan? New strategy? New direction? Who can you call right NOW? Call some clients that left your service - take them to lunch. Call a scary prospect. Where can you go right NOW? Don't hunker down - get out - meet people, network, research, plan.

This is a natural process how humans adapt and EVOLVE. You hit a wall (or a wall hits you), you get frustrated, you do a reality check, and then get up and start running again.

As Rocky says, " Keep Moving Forward".

What do you do when life hits you square in the face?

P.S. Is life hitting you often? Let's talk. I've worked with many clients who've been hit hard — and we developed a successful strategy to grow. If you’re not a client . . . pick up the phone and call me (203.500.2421) — I offer a complimentary session each week to people just like you. Check me out — it might make 2017 a rousing success.

Where There's A Will . . . There's Bill.

Many people tend to put things off in life. And the bigger the decision, the harder it is to make a choice. Especially when it comes to your families' estate. Be it yours, or your parents, a lot of people tend to either  make quick, emotional decisions, or no decision at all. And that's a bad thing.

That's why you need a trusts and estates attorney. They design and implement your plan to preserve, protect, and transfer assets is most effective when completed BEFORE a crisis occurs.

The crisis, however, sometimes arrives without warning, demanding immediate responses to complex legal, tax, business, and health care decisions. Inadequate preparation for life transitions and delayed response often lead to increased costs and loss of control over important personal and financial choices.

When I run into a great resource, my marketing and advertising hat appears, and I want to tell the world about them. If you have an estate, or know someone who has an estate, you need to meet William Tanzi. For over 25 years, Bill has conducted a sophisticated private client and wealth preservation practice centered on providing experienced and effective legal counsel to high and ultra-high net worth individuals and their families.

Bill is a good friend, colleague, and all-around great guy. I don't blog about friends often, but when I do — I know my readers will benefit.

He emphasizes dynamic estate and gift planning, multi-generational wealth preservation and specialized tax and non-tax private client services for high and ultra-high net worth individuals.

So if you want to keep what you have and ensure your kids are protected too — you need to call Bill.

Best Companies: John Neeman Tools.

In 2013, I will be highlighting many old and new companies who embrace 21st century progress and run their businesses differently from the old guard who are quickly dying off. My first is John Neeman Tools. They are a small crew of craftsmen from Latvia who use their heritage of craftsmanship handed down through many generations to design and create woodworking tools. Their process, their method and mission, keeps these traditions and crafts alive and well. In this high-tech age, their traditional craftsmanship is flourishing.

John Neeman Tools is founded by Jacob - a carpenter with love for traditional woodworking and his friend – a village bladesmith. This bond has created a premier company.

They use their hands to produce tools that will live on, to tell their story in the hands of the craftsmen after us. Each tool they make is born with energy and personality – a love and care that will be felt daily by each craftsman, a resonance from the heart of the tool.

Towering factories and belching chimneys are not their game. All of their tools are made in our small traditional workshops using equally traditional methods and techniques. Their focus is on uniqueness and quality, not quantity. They want to help people to remember how to use their hands, to relate their own human energy to their tools – to achieve the true joy of creating something from humble beginnings.

You can learn more about John Neeman Tools and their products here.

Are You Good Enough For Shark Tank?

Ever watch the Shark Tank? It's a reality-based TV show which features a panel of entrepreneurs and business executives called "Sharks" who consider offers from other entrepreneurs seeking investments for their business or product. Sometimes it's great, sometimes it's hokey, but in the end. 7 million viewers don't realize major business learnings are occurring right in front of them.

The premise is simple — the entrepreneur has approximately 3-5 minutes to present their business opportunity/invention and the 'investors' then have the opportunity to bid on it (and hopefully make it a raging success!).

Let's look at what you should be taking away from each episode:

Be Prepared

You can immediately tell who has their pitch down and who doesn't. Who are the fakers and who are the 'real' businesspeople.

It's amazing how many people I meet who don't have their act together when it comes to their business or career. It seems like they are drifting through life, allowing the river to pull them along — no paddling, no rudder — and they might be heading for the rocks . . . or the waterfall.

Talk On Your Feet

In Shark Tank, you only have 3-5 minutes to present your product. You have to give the best and most critical information quickly and in a way where your audience immediately understands what you do and what the opportunity is. Many presenters don't have solid pitches and the ability to answer easy follow-up questions.

Handle Obstacles With Aplomb

It's funny when you see the presenter finish their pitch and are aghast when the investors ask penetrating and direct questions. Many presenters stumble, some are defensive, and only a few have the gravitas to handle the pressure and perform.

Face it — you will hit obstacles EVERY DAY of your life and it's how you deal with those obstacles which define each of us for greatness. That's why they call it 'work'. If you are giving a status update to your board or pitching your services to a new prospect — make the assumption that they will ask hard questions. If they do, it means they are really interested!

Be Able To Sell Yourself Anytime

It's so funny when I bump into someone or I meet them at a networking event and they are definitely not prepared to speak with me about what they do. They obfuscate, they skitter, or they quickly skip over their most important deliverable. Guess what? I've lost interest.

How about saying something like — "When people are stuck, I get them moving forward - fast." or "It's hard to fully trust someone today - they all have agendas - I'm the one executives call who they can trust." (this is what I say)

Know Your Financials

This is my main pet peeve — entrepreneurs go on the show with some outrageous dollar amount in mind and no way to back it up. The minute the sharks begin to ask questions, the entrepreneurs stumble and pause. Not good.

If you are pitching a client, know EXACTLY what is behind your number and what it is composed of — so if they ask, you have an answer. Also, be prepared for a counter-offer and the full ability to explain your deliverables.

Know When To Close

I've seen too many people not know when to close — they fumble along and wait for their client to 'make their move'. You see it constantly on Shark Tank — they do their presentation and then the sharks either bow out or make an offer.

When you hear the 'buy' signal — go in for the 'kill' and close. Ask for their business, negotiate the offer up or down, and shake their hand!

Smile & Walk Away

There are many Shark Tank contestants who are rebuffed by the entire team of sharks. It's usually because they have a bad business idea or they didn't present or negotiate well with the sharks.

IMPORTANT: Even though you have a stellar idea, you can kill it with a bad presentation or negotiation style.

If things don't go well during a pitch or job interview — close, smile, and walk away. Don't let it get to you — it was never going to happen. The more upbeat you are, the more the client will think that they just let the biggest fish of their career, get away.

P.S. As you can probably tell, I love the Shark Tank and hope everyone who reads my blog runs off to watch it!

A Client Made Me Feel Wonderful Today.

"There's not a day that goes by that I don't draw on some of the expertise that Super-Coach Rich Gee has shared with me over the past two years. My natural inclination is to start the day with whatever is in front of me and let chaos reign. But there's this little Rich Gee voice inside my head saying, "Get organized, use your Action Plan Checklist - don't open up your email until 10 AM!" Damn him!

So instead of being scattered, I have a daily action plan that organizes my work and keep me on track. I set goals, get rid of the excuses, make things happen, and get much more accomplished than I ever expected.

If you are seriously willing to make successful changes in how you operate your business, your schedule, your goal-setting, and aspirations, then have that one conversation with Rich Gee.

It will change your life. The real question is: Are YOU ready for it?"

- Dawn Reshen-Doty, President at Benay Enterprises, Inc.

When Things Aren't Working - Do The Opposite.

There's a famous Seinfeld episode where George is at a very low point in his life. Nothing is working and he doesn't know what his next step should be.

You can watch it here: http://youtu.be/cKUvKE3bQlY

What would happen if YOU did the opposite of what your instincts (fear) tell you? If what you've been doing has been delivering the wrong results, what would happen if you did the exact opposite? For example:

• If you have a bad communication channel with your boss, your natural instinct is to shy away. What if you increased your communication and asked the best channel to communicate?
• If you are reticent about attending an event, go to the event with a few friends, buy a new suit, and have new business cards printed. Engage people once you enter and act like the host.
• Having problems with a client or colleague? Instead of letting it go and fester, make a point of engaging that person and see how you can make your relationship healthier, stronger and more resilient.

So instead of doing what you ALWAYS do, try the exact opposite. See what happens — you might surprise yourself!

Is Life Giving You Lemons?

I ran across a powerful quote the other day from Nora Roberts, the romance novelist: “If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place.”

Do you know about Nora Roberts? I met her MANY years ago when I was in Marketing at Waldenbooks/Reader's Market. We hosted an autographing at one of our locations and she had a new romance novel out. She was a really nice person (most authors and celebrities at the time were obnoxious). A lot of you might say with a hint of disdain in your voice, "Oh, she's a romance novelist."

Here are some sobering facts — as of 2011, her novels had spent a combined 861 weeks on the New York Times bestseller list, including 176 weeks in the number-one spot. Over 400 million copies of her books are in print, including 12 million copies sold in 2005 alone. She's a heavy hitter.

Nora began to write during a blizzard in February, 1979 while housebound with her two small boys. With three feet of snow, a dwindling supply of chocolate, and no morning kindergarten she had little else to do. While writing down her ideas for the first time, she fell in love with the writing process, and quickly produced six manuscripts.

She submitted her manuscripts to Harlequin, the leading publisher of romance novels, but was repeatedly rejected. Roberts says, "I got the standard rejection for the first couple of tries, then my favorite rejection of all time. I received my manuscript back with a nice little note which said that my work showed promise, and the story had been very entertaining and well done. But that they already had their American writer. That would have been Janet Dailey."

In 1980, a new publisher, Silhouette books, formed to take advantage of the pool of manuscripts from the many American writers that Harlequin had snubbed. Roberts found a home at Silhouette, where her first novel, Irish Thoroughbred, was published in 1981. She used the pseudonym Nora Roberts, a shortened form of her birth name Eleanor Marie Robertson, because she assumed that all authors had pen names. Between 1982 and 1984, Roberts wrote 23 novels for Silhouette.

Roberts believes that pursuing a career as a writer requires discipline: "You're going to be unemployed if you really think you just have to sit around and wait for the muse to land on your shoulder." She concentrates on one novel at a time, writing eight hours a day, every day, even while on vacation. Rather than begin with an outline or plot summary, Roberts instead envisions a key incident, character, or setting. She then writes a short first draft with the basic elements of a story.

After finishing the first draft, Roberts goes back to the beginning of the novel. The second draft usually sees the addition of details, the "texture and color" of the work, as well as a more in-depth study of the characters. She then does a final pass to polish the novel before sending it to her agent, Amy Berkower. She often writes trilogies, finishing the three books in a row so that she can remain with the same characters.

So let's look closer at her words:

If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it.

How many times have you known EXACTLY where you need to go and what you need to do? In fact, it's right in front of you. But for some reason, something or someone is holding you back. Here's a little secret, most of the time, that obstacle is usually YOU. You might think there are external forces out there — but you are putting those potholes in the road. You need to be very clear about what you want and go after it. Nora could have remained a stay-at-home Mom, but she had a dream of being a writer. And she went after it with gusto.

If you don't ask, the answer is always no.

As a coach, I run into this one ALL the time. People are afraid of asking for that raise, that promotion, that business. They either feel they're not worthy or that they're begging. If you want it — go get it. Nora was turned down a bunch of times by Harlequin, but she kept going back. She wrote whole manuscripts, submitted them, and was nicely declined. But she kept coming back.

If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place.

MOVE. You need to move somewhere and not stay in the same place. When we need to make a life change when life is giving us lemons (and it happens all the time), we tend to get caught up on where to go. Just take ANY step - very soon, you will be making your way forward and moving towards a new location with no lemons.

Listen to Nora, she knows where it's at.

Nora Roberts biographical information was partially gleaned from Wikipedia.

How To Win The Lottery Of Your Life.

From Jeb Corliss (professional skydiver and base jumper): Someone posted this on my page — "I think you should have a "lottery" to offer average "Joe Blows" like me, the opportunity to experience life on your scale. Especially towards the ones who appreciate life as immensely as you do."

I responded with this — That lottery exists :)

It's called hard work and sacrificing everything to live a dream. I started with nothing. I worked in a movie theater making $4 an hour. I ate ramen noodles and only spent money on jumping and nothing else. Anyone can do what I do but not by asking others to do it for you.

You have to get up off your ass and take some risks with your life. There is no safe way to do what I have done. At any turn I could have died and almost did many many times. But I kept taking the risks. I kept braking the bones. I kept watching my friends die. I never gave up and now here I am.

There is no magic leprechaun that's going to do it for you. You have to do it for your self and you have to be willing to take the risks and pay the consequences for your actions. Those consequences are pain, suffering and most likely death. So are you sure you want what I have. Because it's yours for the taking. Just grow some balls and do it.

To learn more about Jeb Corliss, check out his site, his facebook page, and his twitter page. What a guy!

How The Boomers Screwed Up OR We Can All Do Better.

I've been struggling with this generational paradox for the past 5-10 years and have asked a ton of people what they think about it. This theory comes closest to what I feel happened, is happening, and probably will happen. Enjoy! Here's my basic understanding of what went down (this is a long one — so stay with me — it's really important):

The generation that birthed the Baby Boomers suffered like hell. Depression, World War II; they shouldered everything.

So when the US was growing more successful following WWII, they didn't want their children to suffer. And their kids loved this. They lived in relative safety, had a clear boogeyman to fear in the USSR and ideology to love in the US of A. They got opportunities, whether to get jobs straight out of high school, or go to college, or travel the world, or whatever. Not everyone got this, of course, since we still did have poor souls shipped out to Vietnam.

They got awesome music, got to experiment with drugs, and then got jobs alongside their hardworking, nose-to-the-grindstone parents of the "Greatest Generation". And as those parents retired and died, we were left with a overwhelming number of coddled, spoiled children running the show.

And the problem with that is that they haven't grown up. They didn't understand the hardships that drove their parents' decisions. So they made decisions that didn't aim to avoid those hardships, which has saddled us with debt, terrible regulations of tons of industries, and a number of unwanted and unwinnable wars (Iraq, Afghanistan, Drugs), which has led to Gen Xers and Millenials getting the short end of the stick, and being generally bitter about it.

Even a cursory glance at what we call the generations even gives some insight into the Boomers' thoughts toward their children compared to their parents. "Greatest Generation" vs. "Generation X". Past vs. future, and the future gets humped.

Now, that's not to say that every Boomer is like that. Plenty aren't. It's also not to say that this is a 100% correct reading of the situation, but it does seem to reflect what history has shown (so far) the Greatest Generation, Boomers, and Gen Xers to do.

I'm a firm believer in Strauss-Howe generational theory. We've repeated the same cycle of generational 'types' and social climes since the 1700's. Baby boomers are 'idealistic moralists' in favor of wars they themselves don't fight in, and they incite others to make sacrifices. The crisis they are driving us into will have to be dealt with by the scruffy, pragmatic Gen-Xers.

Here's the gist of the theory (from Wikipedia):

To date, Strauss and Howe have identified 25 generations in Anglo-American history, each with a corresponding archetype. The authors describe the archetypes as follows:

Prophet

Born in 1809 and coming of age during the Transcendental Awakening, Abraham Lincoln is identified as a member of a Prophet generation - the Transcendentals.

Prophet generations (dominant) are born after a Crisis, during a time of rejuvenated community life and consensus around a new societal order. Prophets grow up as the increasingly indulged children of this post-Crisis era, come of age as self-absorbed young crusaders of an Awakening, focus on morals and principles in midlife, and emerge as elders guiding another Crisis.

Due to this location in history, such generations tend to be remembered for their coming-of-age fervor and their values-oriented elder leadership. Their main societal contributions are in the area ofvision, values, and religion. Their best-known historical leaders include John Winthrop, William Berkeley, Samuel Adams, Benjamin Franklin, James Polk, Abraham Lincoln, Herbert Hoover, and Franklin Roosevelt. These were principled moralists who waged idealistic wars and incited others to sacrifice. Few of them fought themselves in decisive wars, and they are remembered more for their inspiring words than for great actions. (Examples among today’s living generations: Boomers.)

Nomad

Nomad generations (recessive) are born during an Awakening, a time of social ideals and spiritual agendas, when young adults are passionately attacking the established institutional order. Nomads grow up as under-protected children during this Awakening, come of age as alienated, post-Awakening adults, become pragmatic midlife leaders during a Crisis, and age into resilient post-Crisis elders.

Due to this location in history, such generations tend to be remembered for their adrift, alienated rising-adult years and their midlife years of pragmatic leadership. Their main societal contributions are in the area of liberty, survival and honor. Their best-known historical leaders include Nathaniel Bacon, William Stoughton, George Washington, John Adams, Ulysses Grant, Grover Cleveland, Harry Truman, and Dwight Eisenhower. These were shrewd realists who preferred individualistic, pragmatic solutions to problems. (Examples among today’s living generations: Generation X.)

Hero

Young adults fighting in World War II were born in the early part of the 20th century, like PT109 commander LTJG John F. Kennedy (b. 1917). They are part of the G.I. Generation, which follows the Hero archetype.

Hero generations (dominant) are born after an Awakening, during a time of individual pragmatism, self-reliance, and laissez faire. Heroes grow up as increasingly protected post-Awakening children, come of age as team-oriented young optimists during a Crisis, emerge as energetic, overly-confident midlifers, and age into politically powerful elders attacked by another Awakening. 

Due to this location in history, such generations tend to be remembered for their collective military triumphs in young adulthood and their political achievements as elders. Their main societal contributions are in the area of community, affluence, and technology. Their best-known historical leaders include Cotton Mather, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, John F. Kennedy and Ronald Reagan. These have been vigorous and rational institution builders. In midlife, all have been aggressive advocates of economic prosperity and public optimism, and all have maintained a reputation for civic energy and competence in old age. (Examples among today’s living generations: Millennials.)

Artist

Artist generations (recessive) are born during a Crisis, a time when great dangers cut down social and political complexity in favor of public consensus, aggressive institutions, and an ethic of personal sacrifice. Artists grow up overprotected by adults preoccupied with the Crisis, come of age as the socialized and conformist young adults of a post-Crisis world, break out as process-oriented midlife leaders during an Awakening, and age into thoughtful post-Awakening elders.

Due to this location in history, such generations tend to be remembered for their quiet years of rising adulthood and their midlife years of flexible, consensus-building leadership. Their main societal contributions are in the area of expertise and due process. Their best-known historical leaders include William Shirley, Cadwallader Colden, John Quincy Adams,Andrew Jackson, Theodore Roosevelt and Woodrow Wilson. These have been complex social technicians and advocates for fairness and inclusion. (Examples among today’s living generations: Silent and Homelanders.)

One reason why the cycle of archetypes recurs is that each youth generation tries to correct or compensate for what it perceives as the excesses of the midlife generation in power. For example, Boomers (a Prophet generation, whose strength is individualism, culture and values) raised Millennial children (a Hero generation, whose strength is in collective civic action). Archetypes do not create archetypes like themselves, they create opposing archetypes.

As Strauss and Howe explain, “your generation isn’t like the generation that shaped you, but it has much in common with the generation that shaped the generation that shaped you.” This also occurs because the societal role that feels freshest to each generation of youth is the role being vacated by a generation of elders that is passing away. In other words, a youth generation comes of age and defines its collective persona just as an opposing generational archetype is in its midlife peak of power, and the previous generation of their archetype is passing away.

By the way — I'm a boomer (a late boomer - born in 1962), but still a boomer.

P.S. I'm expecting a lot of hate mail on this one — but I encourage two-way communication — that's what this blog is about!

Why I Attended My Coaching Session This Morning.

Just received this from one of my oldest clients a few minutes ago — I thought I would publish it verbatim. Enjoy! When I rolled over in bed at 5:45 this morning, my usual weekday wake up time, I began to think about my day and realized I had my normally scheduled coaching session at 7:30, meaning I would have to get out of bed soon.

I was thinking I wish I could just cancel the session and grab another hour of sleep. I felt that the session today was going to be less meaningful than others.  There was no “hot and heavy” issue facing me that needs immediate attention.

Oh well, I thought, I will go through the motions and if it turns out that the session is a bust, so be it.  I decided that I would use the session today to discuss a relatively minor event of the day before that had caused me some temporary angst but passed in short order.

My focus would be to ensure that events like these stayed in the temporary and minor range for me. Wasn’t sure a whole session could be filled with that but would go with the flow.

When I arrived at my meeting, spent the first bit catching up with my coach on personal “stuff”.  While chatting, I found myself staring at the piece of paper my coach always brings to every session, a blank, white sheet waiting to be filled with boxes and circles and lines outlining our discussion.

The sheet even had my name on top today reminding me that I was the focus of the session and needed to figure out what I wanted to go over with him.

My first thought was to go with the outline that my coach provides before every session- what were my accomplishments this week?  That would be easy since I made had contacted two people that were on my list from the last session. My coach provided positive reinforcement for doing this and discussed how the meeting that I had and the one that I was going to have were going to fit into my goals.

Where to go to next for the session, I thought about our prior discussion related to managing people that work for me and that I work with.  It was here I could bring up the event of the other day that I had dealt with. Again, my coach complimented my handling of the situation and offered further thoughts on how to set boundaries and expectations that would help when working with these people.

My coach then reminded me that the conference I was going to attend in two weeks, that I had previously mentioned in another session , would be another potential opportunity to identify additional resources for my business .  He told me to think about possibly inviting out one of the speakers of the conference to breakfast or for a drink.  He said a lot of times the speakers are alone at this type of conference and appreciate someone making an effort to include them in the fold.

As the session was nearing an end, I asked the coach how things were going for him.  He shared with me some of his business ideas he was working on and we chatted further about the potential profitability of these ideas. It got my creative juices flowing always thinking about how it is important to keep coming up with new business ideas to keep your business moving forward and be in the forefront of your profession.

We finished up with  setting up our appointment for the following week and said our goodbyes. As I began to walk to my car to begin my workday I began to smile to myself and though okay today turned out to be a more meaningful session than anticipated.

So why did I attend my coaching session at 7:30 this morning? 

• To hold myself accountable on  a weekly basis
• To feel good about my progress/accomplishments
• To be proactive about my business and continual move it forward
• To have a support mechanism for me and my business (business therapy)

So there it is — my client just made me feel wonderful for the weekend. I owe a lot of what I am today to her. - Rich

Who Else Wants To Add Power & Purpose To Their Life?

Ever see the last scene from The Bourne Supremacy? Here it is (start the clip at 1:25 in). In addition to the great soundtrack cut from Moby, you see Bourne walking off into the crowds of Manhattan.

Do you notice HOW he walks? With PURPOSE.

He has a fast stride, is focused, and is determined to move forward, quickly.

I want you to do the same thing. I want you to walk 20% faster than you do now. Why?

1. You get where you're going faster.
2. You use different muscles when you walk faster.
3. You catch people's attention when you move faster.
4. You breathe differently and your heart pumps a bit faster.
5. It adds focus, energy, and action to every step you take.

Let me say that again — IT ADDS FOCUS, ENERGY, AND ACTION TO EVERY STEP YOU TAKE.

Focus - Since you're moving faster, you have to anticipate and react faster. So you have to hone in on what you're doing and focus.

Energy - Since you are moving your body differently and with purpose, you get the lungs, blood, and muscles all flowing.

Action - Combine both of these together and you are adding activity to a mundane process.

How many times do you catch yourself strolling or walking slowly? Ever think about how that makes you feel? That's right — it relaxes you, it slows down the energy, and allows you to focus (i.e., worry) about a lot of things.

Walking 20% faster will get you out of the doldrums, get your juices flowing, and honestly . . . ideas will pop out of your head. You WILL add power and purpose with every step.

Try it.

#001: Bulletproof Your Career [Podcast]

Welcome to my new podcast, Psycho Career & Career Psycho. Like my blog, it focuses on the trials and tribulations we all face in the business world. My goal is to help you live with more passion, work with greater focus, and lead with extraordinary influence.

My co-host is Margo Meeker, one of the best psychotherapists and life coaches out there. I've known Margo for years and have collaborated on many successful workshops with her throughout the U.S..

Why Psycho Career & Career Psycho? First, we wanted to catch people's attention and imagination with the title. We didn't want to do "Biz Talk" or "On The Road" or "Marketplace with Mabel" — we wanted a title that caught your imagination and honestly conveyed what's happening out there in the world right now. It's crazy! There are psychos out there! :)

Also, we wanted to cover what Margo is — a psychotherapist/life coach — and me — a business and executive career coach. So it fits!

We hope to make this a fairly regular podcast (hopefully weekly!). But for now, we are testing the waters and seeing where the rapids take us.

Our first podcast topic is 'Bulletproof Your Career' - how to keep your job and succeed in these tumultuous times. Margo and I cover the four areas critical for every person out there to keep their wits about them while making their way up the ladder of success.

We would LOVE your feedback - tell us what you think!

So without further ado . . . here's our podcast (see top of post)!

Do You Have An Arch-Enemy?

For Batman, it was the Joker. For Superman — Lex Luthor. Spider-Man — The Green Goblin. All were shining examples of light and dark in life — good and evil. Does this happen in real life? Does this happen on the job? Sure.

Do YOU have an arch-enemy? Or someone who exemplifies the term arch-enemy? Someone who:

• Actively thwarts (I love that word) your plans at every turn.
• Throws obstacles in your path.
• Interrupts the smooth flow of your job.
• Tosses a wrench in your presentation or your communication avenues.
• Miscommunicates your intentions to your superiors.
• Causes consternation with your team.
• Forces your peers to take sides against you.
• Is a general pain in the butt?

So what do you do? You have three choices:

1. Confront the person — deal with the issue at hand.
2. Act as if nothing is happening — no hill to die on here.
3. Run away — give in and agree with the person.

Which one do you think I want you to choose? That's right, Number Three.

Bazinga! Sorry, wrong answer. YOU MUST PICK NUMBER ONE.

So, how do you do it?

If you are an executive:

• Start tracking all the things they do to you. A condescending email, a confrontation during a meeting, taking credit for your work. You need to build up EVIDENCE. Just because they hurt your emotions doesn't mean you can do anything about it. You need FACTS.
• Decide when to confront them directly — when are YOU at your best. In the morning, afternoon, or evening. Choose the time.
• Meet with them ALONE and in an area where you can speak freely and frankly. Not a cafeteria — choose a conference room.
• Start out by asking, "Tom, do you regard me as a colleague and friend at this company?" They should say YES.
• Then say, "Then why do you do these things . . ." and begin to bring out each of the things they do to you. Ensure this info comes with people, places, and dates.
• If they deflate and apologize (80-90% of them do), acknowledge their admission, and say you are willing to move on and forget about their past transgressions.
• If they are belligerent and lie, prevaricate, or blame you — clearly state you are here to clear things up and you are onto their game.  If they are unwilling to acknowledge the facts you presented, let them know you will shut them down. This means no communication, no niceties, and if they need ANYTHING, they will get a big FU from you.
• It's your choice at this point to escalate. But beware, most managers hate when their kids don't get along.

If you own a business, it's probably a competitor:

• Again, start tracking all of their transgressions. Do they advertise and put you in a bad light? Do they gossip and lie with your vendors or customers? Do they spread misinformation at industry functions? Track and rate how bad each transgression is.
• Decide if you need to better market your products and services. Maybe they have the upper hand because they are better at marketing. And you might be jealous (this happens all the time).
• If they are blatantly saying bad things about you (like, "The board of health violates them every month."), you need to speak with the owner. It won't be a pretty conversation, but you just can't sit back and have them lie about you.
• If it gets worse, you need to escalate immediately. If they run slanderous ads, talk to the newspaper or magazine. If it's really bad, get an attorney and understand your options.

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. If you have an arch-enemy - Let’s talk. I love working with people who want to 'kill' their competition — call or email me to schedule a complimentary session.

The Power of Connecting With People.

I finally had breakfast with my new and good friend, Eric Rochow. Eric hosts one of the biggest Podcasts on iTunes, call GardenFork. I invited him a number of weeks ago to breakfast. Now the funny thing is, I don't know Eric. And Eric didn't know me.

When I first started to listen to Eric, I found out he lives in Brooklyn, NY during the week and then makes his way to his farmhouse in Colebrook, CT. I could easily identify with him because I have a rural country house in Oxford, CT.

One day, I ran a quick Google Map to find out the best route for Eric to drive from Brooklyn to Colebrook. And guess what? It went right by where I live, on the Connecticut interstate highway named I-84.

So I reached out to Eric by writing him a email, told him how much I appreciate his podcast, and offered to buy him breakfast on one of his sojourns up to his country home. It took a little while, but he responded back via Twitter — he not only accepted my offer, but was impressed with my site and what I do!

In addition, he invited me onto his show to talk about careers, business, time management, gardens, and generators. Click here.

So we finally had breakfast at the incredible Laurel Diner, located in Southbury, CT. We really enjoyed the conversation, the food, and to top it all off . . . Eric interviewed me again! Click here.

So the moral of this story is . . . if you want to meet someone — reach out and make it happen!

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. Having a hard time meeting important people? Let’s talk. I’ve coached thousands to step up their presentation game — call or email me to schedule a free session.

106 Excuses That Prevent You From Ever Becoming Great.

I rarely do this. I'm pointing you to an incredible blog with an incredible message. I'm an avid reader of Chris Brogan's blog and tweets — he is THE guru of social media and tours the world helping organizations efficiently and effectively employ it in their marketing. Well . . . he hosted a guest post from Tommy Walker that knocked my socks off.

I went through all 106 excuses and to be honest — I find many of them creep into my head from time to time. This information is a great way to stop that from happening and ensure you stay on your chosen path to greatness.

So here it is . . . Enjoy!

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. What excuses do you use to keep you from being great? Let’s talk. I’ve worked with thousands of business owners and executives and have helped them manage their 'de-motivational' behaviors — call or email me to schedule a complimentary session.

MLK's "The Fierce Urgency Of Now."

"We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism."- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I still get chills listening to MLK's speech. It's powerful. 

This line always gets me . . . the fierce urgency of now. What does it mean? What does it mean to you?

You might say, "There's no time like the present." or "Strike while the iron's hot.". But they're too weak in my opinion.

What would happen if you lived your life in the fierce urgency of now? No procrastination. No dabbling. No prevarication. Make it happen.Make it happen NOW.

It's time for you to make a decision in your life or your career or your relationships. What do you want to change? What do you want to make better?

Take hold and embrace The Fierce Urgency of NOW and apply it to your life. You might surprise yourself.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

It's sad when you see a true visionary leave this mortal coil before it was their time.

Someone who has done so much in so short a time. Someone who had their ups and downs — a person who built inventions for the masses and took his company from a small garage to the most valuable organization in the world. Steve Jobs touched me in many ways.

Not only with his inventions (1 iMac, 3 MacBooks, 6 iPods, 4 iPhones, and 1 iPad), but even with his presentation style and salesmanship. No one else comes close.

I want to impart his words of wisdom to you in some small way — so here's his commencement address to Stanford in 2005:

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I've ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That's it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents' savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn't see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn't all romantic. I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn't have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can't capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, it's likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope it's the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960's, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish." It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. Thank you all very much.

You Are What You Eat.

Here's an incredible and powerful interview with Lisa Corrado, owner of Lisa Corrado Nutrition. She's a long-time friend, confidant, and really knows what she's doing when it comes to what to eat and what not to eat.

She makes busy people healthier with a combination of clinical nutrition and culinary training. Lisa's services include individual nutritional counseling (both in-office and online), as well as online programs such as Ready-Set-Go! Detox Done Right.

Rich: I know you've worked with a wide variety of clients. What similarities do you see among them?

Lisa: Everyone's busy. But everyone's "busy-ness" is different and poses challenges specific to each person. My job is to understand your personal set of roadblocks and offer do-able action steps to make sure you're eating for your best health. When I work with busy executives, I tell them to plan out what they'll eat for the day as carefully as they plan & prepare for an important meeting. There's nothing more important than our health, but we don't always prioritize it. Maybe it's time we did.

Rich: What do you say to someone who says "My weight's fine. I don't have to worry about what I eat."

Lisa: I say that one day, you'll pay the piper with your health. Being overweight is just one clue that you're not as healthy as you should be. Other clues are elevated blood pressure, cholesterol and glucose readings; GI issues; reactions to eating certain foods. These are all things that you can impact directly and immediately by changing your diet. You have to eat, you might as well eat the right stuff.

Rich: What's your short list of favorite healthy foods?

Lisa: Quinoa is a high-protein grain that's really versatile. I love chia seeds for their omega-3 fatty acids and belly filling powers. Beans are my one of my favorite protein sources. And I'm a sucker for fresh ginger, which is an anti-inflammatory super hero. Actually, all of these foods together would make a really nice meal!

Rich: What made you decide to develop a detox program? I thought you were all about eating properly?

Lisa: I am! And that's why my program focuses on eating rather than deprivation.

I created an online program that gives participants the structure and support to create better eating habits. I've worked with one too many clients who do juice cleanses or fasts, starving themselves for a period of time, then jumping right back into their unhealthy eating habits.

It just seems like such a waste of time and energy to me, and makes it harder for them to implement the lifestyle changes they really need to make. So I came up with Ready-Set-Go! Detox Done Right. Throughout the program, you eat lots of whole, nourishing foods while reducing or eliminating the "noisy" foods that are allergenic, addictive, inflammatory or just not that great for you.

By the end of the program, participants have had the benefit of learning which foods really don't work for them and which ones are real nutritional powerhouses. I load them up with great recipes and they also receive membership in our online community, so they get support from me and their fellow participants.

The feedback is tremendous! Participants tell me they've lost weight, slept better, kicked the diet soda habit and even more. We start on September 25th, so please tell your readers they can visit LisaCorradoNutrition.com/detox for more information.