Top 10 Best Business Rules.

Over the past 10 years of coaching (and 20 years in corporate management), a lot of key knowledge, information, and ideas pass over my desk. Candidly, most of it is a blur. But there are some ideas, certain quotes, and golden rules that tend to stay true and strong in my professional life (and my coaching). So I thought I would write them down and make a list to start off the week:

1. "If you want to be successful, you have to build a ladder rung by rung.  There are no shortcuts."

There are a lot of people out there looking for a silver bullet. And there are a lot of people who promise instant success. My experience over the past 30 years — it takes hard work and a certain amount of time to build something that really matters and delivers true revenue.

2. "Don't waste your time on jealousy."

This is a big one — I can't tell you how many people I've run into in corporate and in the business world who thrive on cattiness and gossip. Although I totally understand competition to drive you and I, I don't understand how it evolves into its addictive cousin, jealousy. It will distract and poison your personality.

3. "Stop being the "YES" person."

You can't walk down the hall without running into one of these. As a peer, they are so easy to spot — they tend to manipulate their superiors by delivering whatever pablum is needed to sustain their vicious life-force. Unfortunately, as a boss, it's hard to differentiate between someone who actually believes in you and someone who is just shoveling more manure.

4. "No matter how bad a situation you are in, remember, it could have been worse."

I love this one. I want you to brand this in your brain the next time something dreadful happens. Instead of focusing on the negativity of the current situation you are in, take a few minutes and realize it probably could have been much worse. You'll find after doing this exercise, a lot of your guilt has washed away and you can now focus on the problem at hand (and fix it!).

5. "Surround yourself with the right people: staff, mentors, colleagues, etc. People make all the difference."

It's not what you know - it's who you know. Go out there and double your connections this year. People are currency in any marketplace.

6. "Don't believe everything you hear."

WOW. I can't tell you how many clients come to me every day with prognostications about the economy, their industry, their competitors, and so-called experts who spin fear to get you to buy their latest 'Sham-Wow'. Take everything with a grain of salt — think about it and really try to understand it — usually it's full of hooey.

7. "The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your arm."

Only YOU can change your situation. Yes, I know you should rely on outside help, friends, and colleagues to make things happen. But when the chips are down and you definitely need things to happen — it's always up to you to start the process.

8. "The way it's always been done isn't always the way to do it."

If I had a dollar for every time I heard, "That isn't the way we do things around here.", I would be living on a lush, tropical island. Corporate drones thrive on the absence of change — and your job (if you choose to accept it) is to prove them wrong. It's the only way everyone moves up and the company evolves.

9. "If everyone likes you, you're probably boring."

I love this one — my mother told me this a long time ago. If everyone likes you, you probably aren't rocking the boat, taking chances, and embracing risk in your life and relationships. Don't strive for the status quo, add a little pizzazz to everything you do and everyone you meet. You'll thank me (and my Mom).

10. "Work smarter, not longer."

If you work with me, this is Rich Gee's Golden Rule. And the funny thing, when I first say it to new clients, they think I'm crazy. They point me to #1 on this list and say "we have to work hard". I totally agree — you have to work hard and SMART. Figure out ways to streamline, delegate, and retire everything you do. Work on the important stuff and get rid of the fluff we like to consume our workday.

What other great pieces of advice guide your professional life?

Image provided by Solo at Flickr.

Your Most Successful Social Media Tool.

There's so much written out there on Social Media. There are experts, seminars, books, etc. all on this topic on how to learn it and leverage it for your business. I'd love to find out what works for you. Twitter? LinkedIn? Facebook? GroupOn? Something else?

But here's the catch — What REALLY works? Where do you make money? Where do you get customers?

Let me know - you can either comment on this post or send me an email - socialmedia@richgee.com.

I'd love to hear from you — I will post the responses.

Are Fashion Mistakes Hurting Your Career?

You know when you meet someone who not only knows their business cold, but they also are an incredible compliment to your existing business? I had the pleasure of meeting a woman yesterday who rocked my world! Ann Lindsay from J. Hilburn.

First impressions are so important and clothes do make a powerful statement about who you are and what you do. To be honest, I run into so many people who dress down so low that it's hard for me to take them seriously.

Ann made a powerful comment to me — even though you might shop at Brooks Brothers, Nordstrom's or Saks, it doesn't ensure the person helping you is motivated or qualified to dress you appropriately for your age, coloring, shape and profession. Ann will.

So go check out her site and hire her immediately — Style of Success - http://www.sosformen.com/

Top 7 Best Questions Coaches Ask Their Clients.

A lot of people ask me, "What happens during a coaching session?" and "What questions do you ask?". A coaching forum that I frequently read actually posed this question. Many senior coaches (including me) responded. Here are some of the best:

1. "Recently, how would you rate your over all life satisfaction on a scale of 1- 10? 1 being "extremely unsatisfied" and 10 being "the best days of my life"?
2. "What are you willing to do to move your life forward?"
3. "What will it take for you to reach the point where you don't need my help again?"
4. ""if you were guaranteed success, what would you do?""
5. "How would you describe yourself to me? How would others describe you to me?"

And my two favorites:

1. "If the answer is you, what is the question?"
2. "What is the one question you are hoping I won't ask you today?"

Feel free to ask yourself these questions — I think you'll be surprised with the answers.

Which one is your favorite? Which one motivated you?

Serendipity With The Apple Store.

Something wonderful happened to me yesterday. Well, let me start from the beginning — I wanted to get the new iPad. Badly.

In fact, I gave up all Christmas & Birthday presents to save up for one. So I was primed to get the iPad2 once I heard that the new release was slated for March.

When the iPad came out on Friday, my family and I traveled to the closest mall to see if we can see one (and secretly get one!).

You've probably heard — the lines wrapped throughout the mall — hundreds of people waiting for hours. We never got to even enter the store. I went home thinking we would show up the next day (when the lines went down) to pick one up. Guess what — all stores were totally sold out.

What I forgot to add is that I made a quick phone call to my good friends, the business managers at the Apple Store, prior to all of this technology hoopla. I asked them, "If the iPad came in, could they hold one for me?". I then proceeded to forget about this call after hearing the pent-up demand and 'no inventory' news.

One quick detour to talk more about the Apple Business Managers. They're the BEST. As a successful entrepreneur, I need a flawless technology platform. The Apple Store does it for me. They go out of their way to make any purchase (I have four MacBook Pros, two iMacs, three iPhones, and about twelve iPods, iTouches, Nanos, and Shuffles hanging around the office and home). Whenever ANYTHING goes wrong, they have impeccable client service that is available and flawless. I LOVE going to the Apple Store.

Now back to yesterday. I was at Pepe's Pizza, hosting my son Andrew's 10th birthday party with a gaggle of kids. I get a call from my one of the Apple business managers — not only has he saved an iPad for me from a secret shipment that he received this morning, he also will give me a discount on my purchase.

WOW. I ran down to the store and picked it up. It's beautiful.

Why am I telling you this story? It's based on all the business I sent the way of this business manager. And many of my friends, colleagues, clients, and acquaintances that I've also sent to that particular Apple Store.

It's called developing deep connections with key people in your business circle. Seeing how you can help THEM — how you can build their business. Always asking, "How Can I Help You?" (see my last post)

Most people don't do it — and they are the ones waiting in line for an iPad.

Has this ever happened to you? How did it make you feel? Do you now deepen your business relationships?

The One Phrase That Will Make You Millions.

And that phrase is: "How Can I Help You?" Stick with me here. If you aren't saying this phrase daily on the job, you are not:

• Delivering excellent service.
• Pushing yourself to new heights.
• Connecting with as many people and growing your network.
• Allowing yourself to be as successful as you can be.

You are not opening yourself up to the universe of opportunity. Okay, I might sound a bit 'out there', but it's true.

We all know the basic tenet of business is service. Whether it is a product, offering, communication, or something else, you need to connect with your clients and customers to deliver optimum service. That's a given.

But to grow from where you are now, you need to transcend the basics and open yourself up to new potentials. One way to do this is to ask: "How Can I Help You?".

Now you might be saying, "Rich, you're crazy." or "I already know that." I totally understand. But here's my point — you need to embrace this phrase and say it to different people EVERY DAY. Don't just hold it in your back pocket and let it out when it best suits you — you need to open yourself up to unforeseen unknowns — and reach out.

I've used this phrase for years with almost everyone I meet (I do have to be slightly selective - some will take advantage of you). Where should you use it?

• Ask your boss if they need any help on a tough project. Tell them you have a little time and can spend it helping them with the more mundane areas of a special project. They will LOVE you.
• Ask everyone you network with how you can help them. It will knock them for a loop. Not only does it catch their attention, it immediately telegraphs that you are a serious professional that wants to get things done.
• Ask each member of your team how you can help them. Tell them if they had to choose one area where you can help them, what would it be? Also tell them that they in turn need to begin asking this question too.
• Extra credit: Ask your family how you can help them. This one will truly throw them for a loop. Be serious — you will not only make their day, you will deepen your relationship with each one. By the way, with your kids, you're teaching them a valuable lesson.

I promise you — if you work this phrase into everything you do in business (and personal life), you will be infinitely more successful, happy, fulfilled, and rich than you ever would be if you didn't say it.

Have you ever actively asked this question? What were the results?

Are You Married To Your Job?

Many clients, when making a major decision about their career, find themselves in a highly conflicted paradox. Based upon all the facts at hand, they want to leave their current job and move to another position at a new job. Simple right?

Not so fast. These clients begin to throw self-made obstacles in their way to discourage, upset, and impair their successful future move.

Why do they do this? Many times it's because they feel a close bond with their current boss, their team, or their company. In fact, any attempt to move forward with their search produces intense feelings of infidelity, like they are cheating on their spouse or significant other. They're doing something 'behind their back'.

A recent example — When going to lunch with a director of another competing firm, you might feel obligated to tell your boss about it, so there are no repercussions. Now why would you want to do that? Many people would feel that it's the 'right' thing to do.

Bottom line, it's none of your boss' business. Unless you are revealing deep company secrets to the other party (and you're not doing that) — no one needs to know, be informed, or get a heads-up about a potential meeting. Why do people do this? Because they feel a certain kinship or marriage to their current company. I've actually heard, "It would be the right thing to do."

The way that I address this as a coach is to take the white elephant from the corner of the room and place it smack dab in the middle of the conference room table.

• "Are you in any way, shape, or form, married to your company?" NO!
• "If given the opportunity and the circumstances were right, would your boss let you go without a second thought?" YES!
• "Then why do you feel that you need to care about them?" I DON'T KNOW — I JUST DO!
• "Do you feel when you meet people for lunch, interview with a recruiter, or pass around your resume, you are 'going behind the back' of your boss or company?" YES!

Why does this happen? Because you've spent a long time with your company and you've developed deep emotional bonds with your team, peers, superiors, clients, support staff, etc. When you make the decision to move, you suddenly feel that you are deceiving them  almost 'cheating' on them. Couple that with an intense feeling of self-worth loss if and when you do leave and they really don't miss you. By the way — that actually happens. They move on.

So when you feel this way, really investigate your fears — odds are they are just misplaced emotions that are holding you back.

Have you ever felt this way when you made the decision to look for employment elsewhere in the marketplace?

How To Sell Anyone Anything.

Provocative title, isn't it? In all of my 20+ years in corporate marketing, advertising, sales, product management, and training, I found one overarching rule that virtually guarantees a positive response and sale from any prospect — STRUCTURE. I know — there are some salespeople who like everything to be loose, open, and flowing during the sales call. Totally understand.

I feel there needs to be an underlying structure to your interaction (with the occasional flowing conversation) to ensure your key talking points are communicated, the prospect gets the correct info at the right time, and you have the ability to do a proper close and get a response (and hopefully, next steps).

As an example, I'm going to reveal my complimentary coaching call structure ("open kimono" if you will - I teach this to all of my mentor coaching clients):

The basic structure is:

• Opening - 2-3 minutes (5%)
• Intro - 'Me' - Background/How I Coach - 5 minutes (8%)
• Coaching - 'You' coupled with In-Depth Coaching - 20-35 minutes (33-58%)
• Feedback on Coaching - 2 minutes (3%)
• Close & Next Steps - 15 minutes (25%)

As you can see, the power of my call is in the Coaching — it provides the flexibility and personalization for the client. Everything else is structure. Why the 20-35 minutes? If I feel there isn't a fit (and after 10 years coaching, I can feel this immediately) — I shorten the call dramatically. Why waste their time (and mine)?

Even within each area, I carefully hone what I say to ensure I stick to my schedule AND provide all the 'buy' phrases for the prospect to latch onto.

So when you are selling (and it doesn't matter if you're in corporate or you own a business - you're ALWAYS selling), what is your basic structure?

1. Opening

How do you start the conversation? How do you spin it around and get them comfortable speaking? Opening really means getting them to open-up and feel relaxed speaking with you about a need they might have.

1. Intro

You need to 'credentialize' you and your services/products. They need to quickly understand you are a serious professional, at the top of your game. You also must position your qualities with their needs. All in 5 minutes (8% of the call). Why? No one really cares about you — they want to talk about their situation. But this area is critical - it has to be a 'quick hit' - get in, say what you need to say, and get out.

1. The Product

This is the area you can flow and work your magic. Let them speak about their issues, problems, or needs. LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN. This also gives you the opportunity to position your wares effectively.

1. Feedback

If you've done your work in the previous section, you should get a positive response. If you don't, this is the perfect time to go deeper and find out why they are not aligned with you.

1. Close & Next Steps

I give this area 25% of the time to not only clearly describe the specific offering for the client (with pricing), but to also handle any objections that might crop up. I always end with next steps — a follow-up call, a welcome packet, etc. I NEVER leave the next interaction hanging.

Do you have a well-rehearsed, timed, and successful structure for your sales pitch?

I close 75% of clients I truly want to work with. Do you?

Grow Your Business and Have Fun With A Blog.

I'm late to the blogging game — I started on January 1, 2009. But over the past two years, I've seen my business explode and in the process, I've had more fun, engaged in more powerful discussions, and I'm thinking about business at a higher level. Why do you think this is happening?

A blog makes you think, ponder, develop and publish important ideas. Every day. It's almost like a crossword puzzle — if you do one every day, it exercises your mind, making new synapse connections and keeping them healthy. A blog does the same thing — it forces you to think of innovative ways to present information that's easy to absorb by the reader.

A blog makes you communicate to the world. Communication in business is paramount and most executives and business owners tend to forget that. My blog is followed by roughly 500-700 people every day — I'm beginning to get future clients calls from California, Hawaii, Canada, UK, and even Stockholm!

A blog invites two-way communication. I get many comments on my blog, not only on my site, but in Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter. People all over the world are expressing their interpretation of my blogs while agreeing, disagreeing and spreading the word.

A blog is easy. For all of you out there who think, "I don't have time to write." or "I don't have the ability to write well." — welcome to my world. I felt that way for years — until I met Rebecca Morgan (link) who convinced me to blog every single day.

At that moment, I realized that my blog, my site, and my ideas should be given freely to the world. It's the 'giver's gain' model — I give freely, and business comes knocking at my door.

A blog is fun. Try not to be serious all the time — have fun with it. Post cartoons, be irreverent, and add a bit a humor every so often. It also is a blast when people call you up, clients comment, and strangers exclaim, "You're Rich Gee? I love your blog!"

In fact, I was sitting in a Starbucks a few weeks ago (my favorite pastime) and someone approached me and asked, "Are you Rich Gee? I was just reading your blog over at that table!" — within 30 minutes of conversation, he was my client.

If you have your own blog — what do you like about the experience? If you don't blog, what's holding you back?

P.S. By the way, if you want to learn more about my blogging experiences (successes and failures) give me a call! I use Wordpress (link) and highly recommend two other sites - Problogger and Copyblogger. Brian & Darren bring lots of great ideas, innovative topics and powerful info — stuff I would never think about on my own. (link) & (link)

20 Tips To Tune Up Your Life.

A number of weeks ago, one of my favorite sites (Reddit), posted an open forum on what small areas of your life you can subtly tune up where it delivered an incredible result. Here are the BEST of the 5000+ entries from people all over the world:

I gave up soda two years ago. I used to drink it like water. Now I drink water. I sleep better and have lost 5% of my body weight without another major change.

Going through my closets, shelves, etc. and getting rid of things that I haven't used or don't really need. As it's often been difficult in the past for me to part with "things," it's become necessary in order to maintain my sanity.

More risk taking, made me feel more alive. Just jumping in and doing something different, getting myself out of my comfort zone. Engaging in conversation with strangers, got me way more friends than I've ever had previously. Also leads to some powerful stories.

I threw out all my old socks, and bought 10 identical pairs. My life is so much easier.

I cut out sugar and vastly increased vegetable intake.

I started working out and trying to eat better, and girls notice me way more now. It was hard work, but I love being fit. It feels much more natural. A funny response to this tip: “Now if you just get a suit you'll be unstoppable.”

I started flossing on a daily basis about a year ago. I'm normally the guy who goes to the dentist and gets the lecture about taking better care of my teeth. The last time I went, the hygienist finished, looked me in the eyes and said "Your oral hygiene is excellent."

I got rid of all my credit cards 2 years ago. I am more careful with how I choose to spend money.

When I see people I know, even acquaintances, I act like I am genuinely really happy to see them and give them a big smile. Someone else did this for me once. I was hooked.

I quit playing video games and ‘surfing’ the web. The days are so long now I have no idea what to do with them. I actually started writing my dissertation and exercising out of sheer lack of anything else to do.

I started waking up at 5:00 AM so I can get in my personal time to read/work on projects before everyone else is awake to distract me. I used to dread waking up early, now I look forward to that time every night when I go to sleep. FYI - I go to bed at 10:00 PM.

Started dressing nicer. People really do notice.

Recently, I've been sitting up straight. I'm tall so I have a tendency to hunch over and slouch when I'm sitting. The posture makes me feel less sleepy and more alert, which is odd because I can't figure out how that works. The trick for me was to roll back my shoulders and the rest kind of follows.

I left my job in a cubicle to teach preschool. It's a lot less glamorous to tell someone that I work in childcare but it has really affected my lifestyle. Surprisingly, I'm a lot less drained at the end of the day. Something about staring at a computer screen for eight hours is just tiring. Now I come home and actually have energy to do stuff. I'm happier, and most importantly I don't dread work on Sunday evening.

Regular meditation. It definitely takes some patience and practice, but regular meditation has amplified my living experience substantially. I am more engaged in the richness of life as a result. I can glide through tasks with pleasant ease, and never feel like I'm flustered or frustrated. It's hard to explain the subtleties of how practicing meditation has improved my overall well being, its as if people, places, goals, tasks and basically everything else has changed around me plus I have a more confident outlook. HERE is a great beginners guide (direct .pdf download)

I stopped caring about what anyone thought about me. I went from being a shy kid, to a successful, confident, happy man!

Here’s my favorite (one person did this!):

• Remind yourself where you want to be, what you want to be doing, and envision yourself getting there throughout the day. If you have a solid vision, you can make it reality.
• Start the day with some change in a pocket you normally don't keep change in. Every time you say something nice to someone move a coin to another pocket. It is a powerful thing to know at the end of the day that, if nothing else, you made a few people feel good about something.
• Cook dinner for your friends once a week if you can. There is no better bonding than regular dinner as a family.
• Introduce yourself to everyone you come into contact with at social events. Everyone has a story to share and most have the desire to collaborate. You'll never know who you might have met and what you could have accomplished together if you don't say hi and they don't know your name.

"Benjamin, I want to say one word to you. Just one word."

A great quote from one of my favorite movies, The Graduate, is centered around the main character Benjamin, who just graduated from college and his parents' good friend, an accomplished businessman, Mr. McGuire:

Mr. McGuire: "Benjamin, I want to say one word to you. Just one word." Benjamin: "Yes, sir." Mr. McGuire: "Are you listening?" Benjamin: "Yes, I am." Mr. McGuire: "Plastics." Benjamin: "Just how do you mean that, sir?"

It's a great line. And when I first saw it in 1973 on TV (on ABC's 4:30 Movie after I got home from school*), I always wondered what was the New Word for my time.

Over the past 40 years, the words have changed dramatically - Oil, Computers, Internet, Clean Energy, etc.  What do you think the new word for our era is?

What area should we be pointing to right now to stay ahead of the pack? Where should we be looking where no one else is looking?

As Wayne Gretzky said a number of years ago, "I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been."

Where do you think the puck is going to be in the next five years?

This post is dedicated to Marilyn Miller, Owner, of United Obligations. She used this quote in her BNI commercial last week and it brought back a flood of memories and emotions. The funny thing about hearing it — the millenials had no idea what Marilyn was talking about. Thank you Marilyn!

*ABC's 4:30 Show was a mainstay in my early teen years. I used to watch all the great flicks like 'Planet of the Apes' among others. Here's the catch — they would take a two hour movie and cut it mercilessly down to 90 minutes — with commercials. So I would see a normal two hour movie with 50% cut from the show. It was amazing in later years to revisit many of these movies and realize that there were whole characters and scenes missing from my original viewing.

The Secret To Become Truly Happy.

Are you fulfilling your destiny? You have it inside you — you know it and I know it — you just have to make a personal decision to bring it out. What are your desires? Your TRUE desires. Not "I want an iPad" or "I want a promotion". What do you REALLY want to do with your life?

This is NOT a hard question — it's not complicated — what excites you IS your destiny. You just have to realize it and move forward towards it.

The problem is that we tend to stick stone walls between us and our destiny.

What are you passionate about? What do you really love doing? Who do you like to hang around with? Where do you like to go?

Let's be honest with ourselves — it probably isn't an inner cubicle with florescent lighting for 8 to 10 hours a day. Throw in various team status meetings in confined conference rooms with no windows and jerks that lurk around every corner — I know of no one who looks forward to that.

So why do we do it? It's the security and the money. But that's not true.

• Security — There is no security in today's workplace. They can fire you at the drop of a hat. So stop kidding yourself.
• Money — If you figure in all the money you make and then all the expenses you need to make that money (clothes, commute, lifestyle) and the taxes, it's really not a lot compared to the possibility of doing what you REALLY love and making just a little bit less.

Do you like to build things? Do you like to work with people? Do you like to engage and motivate people? Do you like to work with other age groups (children or seniors)? Do you like to be outdoors or indoors? Work with your hands?

The funny thing is — we tend to let life and other people take our destiny over. They make the decisions where we go, what we do, where we work, who we interact with.

That's why you feel that there is something missing from your life — a hole, an emptiness, a void that cannot be filled based on your current viewpoint.

You need to change your view, wear new glasses, step out of that cubicle and figure out what excites you. What energizes you. What motivates you.

Keep saying this to yourself, "You are not meant to live a miserable, unfulfilled life." Don't spend 30 years doing something you don't like to do.

Make that change TODAY.

Who has made the change and feels 1000% better that they made that change? Let me know!

How To Survive A Toxic Workplace.

Once you’ve diagnosed if you are working in a toxic environment — see my last post — there are a number of ways to deal with it:

1. Leave.
2. Stay and move to another team/department/division/location.
3. Stay and endure.

It’s that simple. Choices #1 and #2 deal with the situation most effectively, they remove you from the environment and allow you to begin anew.

Today, let’s look at choice #3. At least for the short term (hopefully!) you need to stay where you are and contend with the forces making each day painful.

Step One — It’s Not Me, It’s You.

You need to get your head wrapped around the idea that it’s not you. You are not incompetent, crazy, unprofessional, or whiny. It’s the situation around you. Acknowledging this first step will be a major change in your demeanor.

When we are in a toxic environment, we tend to constantly question ourselves. We doubt our decisions, actions, management, interactions, communications — everything.

A toxic workplace’s first rule of order is to get you to doubt your abilities. Why? You become passive, you don’t fight, you give in and ultimately, you start questioning your abilities and ultimately feel like a failure.

Also, you feel that you can never leave, because you don’t have the chops to make it anywhere else (for the same amount of money). That's a form of 'golden handcuffs'.

Step Two — Develop An Action Plan

As I always say to my clients, get it out of your head and down on paper. You need to think clearly about yourself and your situation. Once you’ve come to the conclusion that ‘it’s not you’, you need to document what elements of your environment ARE toxic.

Is it your boss? Is it your peers? Is it management? Is it another department that is asking outrageous requests? Pinpoint the WHO and WHERE. This will allow you to define the specific influencers causing the toxicity.

Then under each one, define WHAT do they do. For example, you can write, “My Boss — she is condescending whenever I’m around and adds snarky comments to whatever I do.”

Then define HOW you will diffuse the toxicity of their behavior/attack. This leads me to:

Step Three — Choose a Judo or Jujutsu Technique

What is Rich talking about? Let me define each one:

Judo - Immobilize or otherwise subdue one's opponent with a grappling maneuver or force an opponent to submit by joint locking or by executing a strangle hold or choke.

Jujutsu - Manipulating the opponent's force against himself rather than confronting it with one's own force - "gentle, supple, flexible, pliable, or yielding."

I want you to execute your action plan. When they encounter you — be prepared to either:

Engage (Judo) Stand firm with your position and explain its merits. Don’t back down. If you’ve done your homework, you know the who, where, what and how to diffuse them. Hold your ground — you are the strong one — they are the incompetent one. If it is a boss or other management, hold your ground and then at the last minute, do the Jujutsu sidestep (below). If you do this on a regular basis, they will know that you are a force to be reckoned with.

The phrase 'Ask forgiveness rather than permission' works well here. If the toxicity is at a high level — do what you need to do (ensure that it is the right thing to do) and then ask forgiveness.

Sidestep (Jujutsu) Use the person’s force/weight against them — give them enough rope and then pull the rug out from under them by using facts. They might try to fall back on emotions (“This is how we’ve always done it!”) — but you’ve done your homework. This works especially well with peers.

Bottom line — these tactics work in the short run. Again, you need to either leave the department or leave altogether. If the toxicity is endemic — you will never win.

What other tips/techniques have you used in your fight against toxic environments?

Run Out & Buy 'The Thank You Economy'.

Let me state something right off the bat — I LOVE Gary Vaynerchuk. A little secret of mine — when I want to get pumped up for the day or I'm feeling down, I pop in Gary's 'Crush It' audiobook. His enthusiasm, energy, and ideas blow me away every time.

I just finished my publisher's preview copy of The Thank You Economy (due to be released on Tuesday, March 8th). Once again, Gary not only hits a home run — it's a grand slam.

Gary has delivered another opus of energy, bundled with a myriad of proven business tips on how to interact with our customers. The explosive growth of social media is quickly delivering unprecedented power and breadth to everyone's customer base. No longer can you treat anyone badly — you need to integrate specific inter-personal behaviors into all parts of your company.

But it's just not your customers — it's your employees, your partners, distributors - everyone. I consistently speak and write about the "shark mentality" in business — take no prisoners, no one counts unless it's you, run over everyone to make more money.

Gary's philosophy is at the exact opposite end of the spectrum:

• Caring is the key word here — be self-aware (EQ), commit to change, invest in your employees, be authentic (I've been saying this for years) and empower your people.
• Let your client help you develop, guide, and modify your brand. They are an integral part to the entire process.
• Community is critical — get the conversation going and flowing.
• My favorite — If you're small, play like you're big; if you're big, play like you're small.

It's the humanization of business.

Great words from a 21st century sage. I hope to someday meet or speak with Gary — I think he and I would hit it off quite well. Gary transcends the typical, boring, stale business book (as I've always said, 98% of them suck). His genius integrates great ideas with the energy of the sun — you just want to run out and execute all of his ideas immediately.

So go out — nay . . . run out — and get this book, or kindle download, or audiobook (my favorite). You will thank me.

What are your thoughts about Gary Vee? Do you love him as much as I do?

3 Clues You Work In A Toxic Workplace.

Many years ago, I worked for a short time at an organization who slowly tapped my energy, subsumed my enthusiasm, and drained my confidence. I’ve worked for many companies — large, small, corporate and family-owned. This organization was a real winner to experience. In retrospect, there were many reasons why it was such a huge sucking force of negativity:

• Management had no clue what they were doing (inept).
• All levels of management changed hands frequently.
• Middle management (my peers) ran around like chickens without their heads.

I can go on for hours.

Bottom line — it was a dysfunctional atmosphere. But it paid well — so like an idiot, I stuck around. I think there are many people today who do the same thing — put up with a highly abnormal environment, try to stay normal, and slowly get dragged down by the insanity. They start to question their own abilities.

It’s like being the only sane person in an insane asylum.

So here are three major clues you can use to diagnose your 'toxic' situation:

Every man/woman for themselves.

This is a natural by-product of a toxic workplace. You feel that you have to justify every decision multiple times because everyone is questioning where to go and what to do. Instead of declaring a single destination and developing a plan to get there, everyone is spinning off in multiple directions.

Your boss can never give you a straight answer — they might give you clues, but will never commit to a rational line of attack. Meetings are so fun to attend/host, because there will be one (or more) attendees who will attempt to sabotage the proceeding for their own ends.

Power is held in abnormal areas.

In a normal organization, authority flows from the top down. And the top gets their marching orders from the marketplace. Toxic workplaces tend to have power centers in areas that try to guide the direction of the company that best suits them, not the company; it’s kidnapped and along for the ride.

Upper management might feel that they have the reins, but they really don’t. It might be the manufacturing arm (the people that make the stuff) that runs the show. It’s like the manufacturing arm of GM or Ford delivering what they felt the marketplace needed without consulting with Marketing, Customer Service, the Dealers, or Finance. They just pumped out what they thought the cars should look like.

The problem is that these power centers direct and position the company to suit their goals — and it might not be in the best interest of the rest of the company. If you are trying to run your department and division, you'll constantly run into their abnormal decisions because you expect the company to run normally.

Black is white — up is down.

This is a big one — no real adherence to a strategic direction. They might decide on an overall plan of attack — but halfway through the charge down the hill, they radically change course, veering left and right and even contradicting what they said a number of months ago. The kicker — they give no reason — they just do it.

And if you get caught in the crossfire — protesting that the vision was to go in a certain direction, you get ridiculed for going that way. It’s as if everyone was wearing Ugg Boots one day and when you purchased them and wore them to work, everyone said they were passé.

There are so many more — but these three clearly exhibit a toxic and dysfunctional organization. If you have one, you might be able to still stay sane. Two or three, I would suggest looking for a new home.

It’s not worth damaging your career, confidence just for the money.

What other areas contribute to a toxic workplace?

When Someone On Your Team Quits.

It happens all the time. As a manager of people for over 20 years, I learned a lot of basic rules how to hire, onboard, manage, lead, motivate, layoff and sometimes fire my staff. I saw my colleagues consistently fail in just one area — when someone on their team gave their notice to leave. So I have some tips on how to handle it and make it a win-win-win for you, your soon-to-be leaving colleague, and the company.

Trust me — if you deviate from any of these tips, things might get messy:

• If you surreptitiously find out ahead of time, don’t approach the person. Let them come to you. It ensures that you handle the interaction formally and allows the person to do it on their time.
• When the person meets with you they will probably want to do the talking. Many exiting employees sometimes hand you a formal letter to read (and that’s fine). Let them talk and get it out — this is very hard for people to do. Shut up and let them speak.
• When it’s your turn to reply — this might be hard — I want you to effuse positivity. Why? Positivity changes the whole situation from a fight, disagreement, bad situation instantly into a plus for you.
• They’ve already made the decision to leave. Whatever the reason (you, pay, the environment, the work, etc.) there’s usually nothing you can do about it. Don’t fight it — embrace it.
• Be their cheerleader. Turn a possible bad situation (maybe they didn’t like you) into a good one by asking how you can help them. A recommendation letter, a good word, flexibility with the transition — reach out to them.
• Reckon back to when a boy/girlfriend broke up with you. The best way to handle it is to remain positive and agree with their decision. Again, they’ve already made the decision to leave. Your positivity will keep them a little off-kilter and plays well for you.
• Don't take it personally. 95% of the time it's not you, it's something else.
• It’s also important for your reputation. Some people might look at this as a wound to your organization (peers especially take glee in this) — the more positive and planned your response is — the better it will be seen by your team, peers, and management.
• Try to nail down their transition plan — how long they are staying, what will they wrap up, what they are responsible for, who they will instruct on any outlier projects, etc. Even though they agree to a set amount of time (at least two weeks) it’s usually a lot less in reality.
• Come to the conclusion they are gone right after they leave your office — it makes it easier that you have no unreal expectations when they leave early, call in sick, or come in late. Face it — in their mind, they’ve gone. This helps you set a focused mindset on transition immediately.
• Set communication parameters before the meeting ends. They are leaving — you are staying — so it’s best if you immediately communicate to your superior and get a transitional message out to let the rest of the team/organization know.
• Do you have an approved and in-place succession plan for your team? If you do — contact the person immediately to discuss their good fortune ASAP. If you don’t, time to make the donuts — make one, get it approved, and stick it in a drawer for future use. You will thank me. Another tack is to communicate to your team immediately and see who steps up to fill the void. You might be surprised.
• Let your superiors know ASAPbefore they find out from someone else. Let them know you have a plan in place:
  • No replacement - the remaining team absorbs all responsibilities.
  • Reorganization - this is a blessing in disguise — you can change the structure immediately.
  • Internal replacement - someone from the team or organization.
  • External replacement - time to get HR involved and get the resumes flowing in.

• This is a hard one — but it works: When they leave your office, get it in your head — they are already gone. Start making plans immediately and work with your team to fill the vacuum. Start de-listing them from future meetings — candidly, they will not be very important to the future proceedings and sometimes they become an irritant.
• Don't ever trash-talk them after they give their notice (this happens ALL the time). This is a common and rookie mistake. Talk them up, make it sound like this is planned, and is a good thing. Be professional.
• Make sure HR is involved at all junctures. Some people do weird things when they give their notice. They suddenly try to sabotage projects or down-talk the company since they have a better spot to jump to. If you see this happening, release them immediately. In any event, start the process of disengagement with HR. It's their job and they’re really good at it.
• Celebrations/Get-Togethers are up to you. Try to have it off-site at a restaurant/bar so you can attend and have the ability to dis-engage when you want/need to. Again, be positive to keep the new momentum going.

Smile — just think — someone better might be right around the corner.

I’ve only touched the surface on this topic - what other tips do you use when people leave your organization?

How To Deliver Incredibly Bad Service.

This weekend, my family and I ventured to a large, local shoe store to pick up a pair of shoes for me and sneakers for my two sons. Not to bore you with a long story, here's what happened:

1. Initially, no one approached us when we entered the store and began to look at shoes.
2. Until I tried on a pair (the demo pair was my size) a salesman ran up to us to ask us if we would like to purchase the shoes.
3. I asked the salesman (he's in his late 50's) about the relative merits of one shoe manufacturer over another — he had no clue. He also coughed like he had a bad disease. He followed (stalked) us all around the store — I got the feeling that he worked on commission and there was a 'territorial issue' with sales.
4. Our sons shoes were actually from a 'half-off' rack in the front — discontinued styles — but brand new sneakers. Unfortunately, we thought the $80 sneakers were $40, but they were really $160 marked down to $80 (we found out when we were checking out). Honestly, these were not $160 sneakers.
5. We left the store with a sour taste in our mouths and no shoes.

Guess what? I just made another purchase at one of my favorite companies, Zappos. Why are they my favorite? They exemplify good service, a large product selection, and reasonable prices. And no salespeople with tuberculosis.

I found the exact same shoes for me - for $5 less, free shipping, and no tax. My son's sneakers were also marked down to $52 from their original price of $80. Go figure.

At the bottom of Zappos' web page, something caught my eye: "As we grow as a company, it has become more and more important to explicitly define the core values from which we develop our culture, our brand, and our business strategies."

These are the ten core values that the Zappos family lives by:

1. Deliver WOW Through Service
2. Embrace and Drive Change
3. Create Fun and A Little Weirdness
4. Be Adventurous, Creative, and Open-Minded
5. Pursue Growth and Learning
6. Build Open and Honest Relationships With Communication
7. Build a Positive Team and Family Spirit
8. Do More With Less
9. Be Passionate and Determined
10. Be Humble

There aren't many companies I know that exemplify these values. Many of them have a hard time exemplifying just one of these values. My questions for you today:

What would your career be like if you came up with a list of YOUR own core values?

What would your company be like if you had your own list and published it?

It's my birthday today . . . and I have a GIFT for you!

I'm 49 today. And I feel UNBELIEVABLE! Over the past few years, many of my clients have been clamoring to break into and access the secret world of Rich Gee. They want insights into my thinking, my resources, and my tools.

It came down to my staff telling me "You just gotta do this!"

So I sat down and took ALL of my systems, articles, tools, videos, training, workshops... EVERYTHING... and put them in one place easily accessible 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year.

And I mean EVERYTHING. I've taken every tool I've used in my 20 years of corporate management, added every business system I've produced, and mixed them with my 10 years of coaching tips to deliver a powerful 1-2 punch for your career.

The RESULT: It's called INSIDE TRACK with Rich Gee - to give you the "inside track" on your career. To do better and reach higher heights.

To learn more — check it out here.

Before I forget - here's your GIFT (it's a sample tool that I offer within INSIDE TRACK).

Have an incredible day!

Why You Never See It Coming — Deadly Blind Spots In Business.

There are things you know (e.g., how to run a meeting) and there are things you know you don’t know (e.g., open heart surgery techniques). Then there are things that you don’t know that you really know (how to stay focused and calm during an emergency).

Today, let’s talk about the unknown unknowns. The times where things jump out of nowhere in our business life and bite us right on the butt (and hold on!).

But how do we uncover those unknowns that we don’t know? How do we find something that we don’t know is lost? Perplexing isn’t it?

You fail because you didn’t:

• Read market signals in a certain way.
• See that your most trusted ally is moving to the competition.
• Know about the ‘hidden’ competition eating your lunch.

In the 90's, U.S. sales of Mercedes Benz plunged 24% due to Lexus/Acura/Infiniti imports. Up until that time, their senior management refused to acknowledge the existence of competition.

Up until 1980, internal correspondence at Sears never even mentioned Walmart.

Sometimes, reality is staring you right in the face . . . and you don’t see it.

So how do you uncover YOUR blind spots? Three ways:

1. Stop being so insular and bubbled-up. Open your peripheral vision to what’s happening in the world outside.
2. Encourage your team, your divisions, your entire company to keep their eyes peeled for products and competition that could slowly (or quickly) eat away at your market share.
3. Think outside of the box. Did you actually think we'd be carrying a GPS, Walkman, DVD Player, Menu Guide, Weather Station, etc. IN OUR PHONE?

Ask everyone for their opinion and LISTEN.

You don’t need to act on everything, but if you’re a faithful reader of Michael Porter’s Competitive Strategy, track it, measure it, and address it when the time is right.

What blind spots have bitten you in the past?

10 Best Sites I Visit Every Day.

A lot of readers and clients have been asking me what are my favorite and most influential sites I visit. The one that get me excited about work and life. I do read a lot on the web during my off hours and find there are certain key sites who do a great job to help me stay up on business issues and personal interests. In no special order:

Popurls

My first stop. This is an aggregator site which brings together many other aggregator sites like Reedit, Digg, Metafilter, Delicious, etc. It delivers the best of the best. Be careful, you can spend HOURS here. (Link)

Wall Street Journal

My business info standby. I can whip through this paper pretty quickly - I don’t get caught up in the opinion - I focus on the facts. Who’s up, who’s down, who’s doing something new - it’s all here (I get this delivered in paper form daily). (Link)

The Economist

Deep, deep analysis of the world from an international viewpoint (I also get this in print form too). (Link)

Cool Tools

My favorite gadget site by Kevin Kelly. A cool tool can be any book, gadget, software, video, map, hardware, material, or website that is tried and true. All reviews on this site are written by readers who have actually used the tool and others like it. Items can be either old or new as long as they are wonderful. (Link)

Twitter

I follow a number of key influencers - Gary Vaynerchuk, Chris Brogan, Robert Scoble, Ivan Misner, Tom Peters, Alyssa Milano (no kidding - she’s great), Michael Hyatt, Soraya Darabi, and Brian Soils. It’s immediate, recent and I can pop in, read, and pop out pretty quickly. It bugs me when people complain about Twitter (I don't have the time!) — it's a tool — use it as a tool, not a TV show.  (Link)

Lifehacker

A great site delivering tips and downloads for getting life and business things done. Unfortunately, they just went through a horrible redesign making their site virtually unusable (owned by Gawker Media - all of their sites have the same architecture and navigation now - I hate it). Still great info. (Link)

Copyblogger & Problogger

Read both of these and your writing will most certainly improve. Brian & Darren bring lots of great ideas, innovative topics and powerful info — stuff I would never think about on my own. (Link) & (Link)

Seth’s Blog

The great Seth Godin — he's a god. Nuff said. (Link)

TED

If you haven’t visited here - you have been missing the best of the web. TED (Technology Entertainment and Design) is a global set of conferences formed to disseminate "ideas worth spreading. All of their speakers and videos are online — I link to them often. (Link)

Inc. & Entrepreneur

Two great magazines who have all of their articles online. Great for the practicing or budding entrepreneur in all of us. (Link) & (Link)

Image provided by OakleyOriginals at Flickr.