Your Communication Skills Stink.

If you pare down your job or business — and take away all the extraneous stuff you do — the most important part is COMMUNICATION. Simple, two-way and CLEAR communication. I give you information and I get your response. You tell me to do something and I tell you when I can get it done. I explain the merits of my products and services and you buy. And on and on and on.

Here's the simple fact — it's not as easy as it looks. In fact, some people tend to screw it up most of the time and wonder why they are being listened to or why their people or clients are not doing what they've been told. Do you find yourself saying:

• "They just aren't listening!"
• "Why are my clients checking out?"
• "Why do I tell my team one thing and they do another?"

If you catch yourself saying these and other choice phrases — you might need to tighten up your communication style.

Communication is a very complex process. When you communicate, you need to keep a sharp eye on the person you are communicating to. Why? There are so many signals where you need to modulate your communication to ensure they are understanding what you're saying.

Communication is made up of two competing spheres:

1. Facts & Information (F&I) - this is the 'what' of the conversation. And usually where you do a good job of transmitting.
2. Emotions & Feelings (E&F) - this is the 'why' of the conversation. And usually where you do a bad job of transmitting.

To communicate effectively, you need to better balance the two. Most of the time, we spend 80-90% of our efforts in F&I and 10-20% in E&F. Unfortunately, in certain situations, you need to increase your E&F — but you don't — and this is where communication breaks down.

Why does this happen? Because communicating facts and information are easy — you just blabber away. Emotions and feelings take a certain amount of restrain — you have to ask questions, listen, and react to the other person's feelings and emotions. And that's hard for most people. It's the EQ (emotional quotient) of the conversation.

The bottom line — if you take the E&F into account and speak to it — your communication success will increase exponentially.

But how do you bridge that gap? Three steps:

1. Bring Them In.

Bring them into the conversation. If you find you are doing all or most of the talking, STOP. Start asking them questions, get their side of the conversation, issue, or situation. Then paraphrase what they said to ensure you are listening correctly, and then ask more questions. We tend to blabber on without a care about the person we are speaking with. One of my favorite phrases to use is "Tell Me More". If that fails . . .

2. Ask Them A Permission Question.

Pause and then ask one of these permission questions:

• May I offer a suggestion . . . ?
• Can we further explore . . . ?
• Would it be alright if . . . ?
• With your permission, can we . . . ?

These permission questions immediately stop the conversation, reverse it, and allow you to better understand what's going on in the head of the person you're speaking with. If that fails . . .

3. Tell Them A Story.

One of the best ways to bridge the gap between Facts & Information and Emotions & Feelings is to tell a related story, example or scenario. It adds weight to the conversation and allows the person to visualize and mentally illustrate what you're talking about.

Each of these steps allows the speaker — YOU — to better communicate, bring the client or team member into the conversation, and hopefully deliver better, faster and more clear communication to whatever you do.

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW 

10 Tips For More Successful Presentations.

Yesterday, I presented in front of a Fortune 50 organization and spoke on the subject of 'Closing The Sale'. It's a near and dear topic with me and I feel EVERYONE needs to always brush up on their closing techniques. I was so happy to receive hearty applause from the group when I finished — many team members came up to me afterward to shake my hand. During the entire morning, I realized I've 'built-in' a number of successful habits when I deliver presentations and I thought I would relate them to you — so here goes:

1. Pack up the night before.

I check (and double check) all of my files, my laptop, my projector and all of the peripherals/cables needed the night before. I ensure they are packed and ready to go in the morning. I know of so many instances when people forget things for their presentation — a cable, adapter, handouts, etc. and it makes them spin into a tizzy prior to their presentation. Prepare.

2. Arrive early.

Really early. Hours early. I arrived at my location at 6 AM to set up my laptop, projector and to check if everything was ready to go. I can't stress this enough — nothing went wrong, but if something was amiss, I had ample time to repair it.

3. Greet everyone as they come in.

I make it a point to stand by the door to greet people as they enter. It breaks down the 'wall' which develops with presenters and the audience. They get to meet you, ask questions, you can ask questions of them — it's a win-win for everyone. In addition, you can find out more about them and position your talk to their needs.

4. Build an intro slide.

I always have my laptop powered up, my projector running and an intro slide with me welcoming people. Usually my slide would say GOOD MORNING TEAM! It's a nice way to greet people AND it is a great excuse to have my entire setup on and ready to roll for my presentation. I hate when presenters are introduced and they are fidgeting with their laptop, projector, and cables to get everything running.

5. Ask if everyone is 'READY'.

I always begin with a slide (after the title slide and introduction) to stop and ask the audience if they're ready. It jolts them at first but then I get a resounding 'YES!' and their attention is on me and their blood is pumping.

6. Ask a lot of questions.

I make it interactive and ask the audience a lot of questions — "Has this happened to you?" — "How do you feel about this?" It allows me to keep the volley moving between speaker and audience.

7. Use the audience as examples.

During my pre-talk greet with the audience, I get to know their names, professions, and some of their worries. During my presentation, I might use them to reinforce a point I'm making by singling them out and using them in a fictitious example. They always agree with me and everyone around them gets the message — they could be next!

8. Watch the clock.

I always ensure I've locked down the EXACT length and time to present. Hosts ALWAYS try to cut it short, so I make sure I meet with them prior to the talk and clearly define MY time on stage. I then reiterate my start time and end time and in a very nice way let them know not to cut it short. It seems every host has a secret need to let their people out early and I have to head that inkling off at the pass.

9. Always leave time for questions.

Know when to stop and leave time for the audience to expand on what you just presented. Not only does it clear up some things for them, it allows them to flourish you with accolades in front of the audience.

10. Be available after the talk.

I always buffer additional time after all of my speaking gigs to allow the audience to meet me, speak with me, ask questions, and exchange cards. I get a LOT of business that way. So stick around and be available — I find there usually is a line of people ready and willing to reach out and touch you.

TED Talk: Amy Cuddy - Physical Dominance.

Body language affects how others see us, but it may also change how we see ourselves. Social psychologist Amy Cuddy shows how “power posing” — standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don’t feel confident — can affect testosterone and cortisol levels in the brain, and might even have an impact on our chances for success.

[ted id=1569]

This talk was presented at an official TED conference.

It's All About GRACE.

I was sitting in church last night during our Maundy Thursday service and as I was reading along in the cantata, one word kept popping up. GRACE.

And I realized, we all can do with a little more GRACE in our lives in how we treat other people. Honestly, when was the last time you used the word GRACE in conversation?

As you know, this is a business and career blog — so how do I incorporate GRACE into that?

The definition of GRACE is:

As a noun — simple elegance or refinement of movement or conversation.

As a verb — to do honor or credit to (someone or something) by one's presence.

So here goes:

1. When dealing with a direct report, add a bit more grace to the conversation. Show them a bit more refinement in your words. Even if they've done something wrong, try to credit them in some way.
2. At a meeting, comport yourself with a little more grace than usual. Listen to what other people say without barging in and giving them your perspective.
3. Be grateful you have a business or career and let others know it. Tell your boss or clients how much they mean to you. Honor them.
4. When meeting someone for the first time, show them how refined you really are. Don't be pushy, brazen, or assertive — simple elegance will take you far.
5. It does matter for any gender: If you're a woman, elegance and refinement come easily to you — use them frequently. People will be impressed and call you a 'sharp' executive. If you're a man, spend a bit more time giving credit or honor to people — they will start calling you a 'true' gentleman.

TAKE ACTION: Over the next week (or two), take a Post-It note and write GRACE on it. Whenever you have an opportunity to interact with another person, add a bit more of YOUR GRACE to the conversation.

You might not only surprise yourself — others will be surprisingly impressed.

I'D LOVE TO HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS ON MY MESSAGE TODAY. SEND ME YOUR MESSAGE BELOW!

How's Business? You Need A Business Coach.

You've got a business. It might be doing well — it might not be doing so well. If you hire a business coach, they tend to focus on a specific area of your business — your marketing, your financials, your staff, etc. They focus in on your 'pain point' because it's their specialty. If you go to an ear/nose/throat specialist, they will pinpoint your sickness within your ear, nose, or throat. But what you really need is someone who brings it all together. Who can help you view your entire business and help fix what really needs fixing.

That's what I do. The other day, I ran a cool program called Wordle, a free web program which takes a paragraph/page of writing and transforms it into a word cloud. I took a combination of my web bio and my business acceleration page and developed my first word cloud found at the top of this page.

What words immediately stand out?

• LOVE
• BUSINESS
• PEOPLE
• CLIENTS
• HELP
• FUN

I love what I do. I've been a coach for almost 14 years. As a FULL-TIME coach, I work with many businesses to help them figure out what their next steps will be. In fact, I just celebrated 10,000+ hours coaching — if you want to see what that means, click HERE.

I am a business coach. Not a 'life' coach, or a 'financial' coach, or a 'marketing' coach. I am a business/career coach who helps people with their business life. If you want a blankie to keep you warm, look elsewhere.

I am people- and client-oriented. I am not off running multi-marketing junkets — I coach people. Serious people. I spend time with my clients to ensure they succeed. Ask me about Lifeline calls — my clients love them.

I'm here to help. I worked in corporate for over 20 years and found my direct affect on impacting people in a positive way was diminishing. So I refocused it on directly helping people by coaching. I've been put on this earth to help as many people as I can.

Finally, I want to have fun with my clients. Too many things in life are boring and too serious — I want to make the process more fun.

Our Favorite Four-Letter Word Starts With An 'F'.

Gotcha. You thought I meant that other word. I'll save it when I hit my finger with a hammer.

Today's four-letter word starting with an 'F' is: FEAR.

We all have some sort of fear at some level at some time in our life. It might be a very present fear staring us in the face or it might be a background fear hiding in the attic — but it's still there doing its dirty work.

I know your fears. How? We all have the same fears . . . Fear of:

• Meeting new people
• Asking or demanding more from your team
• Stepping outside of our comfort zone
• Pushing back on your boss or a client
• Losing your job or a major client
• Fear of failure
• Fear of success (this happens more than you think)

Fear sucks. But what really is fear?

• It's the future. It's what is going to happen.
• It's the unknown. Anything can happen. You might looks stupid or unprofessional.
• It's the loss of security. When you are insecure, you begin to get anxious.
• It's your mind taking you from anxiety, mixing in a little bad thinking — and you get fear.

Anxiety is not all bad. It's your body telling you that you are stepping out of a secure zone in your life. You're pushing yourself — you're trying something new.

Unfortunately, your mind takes over and you begin to spin terrible stories in your head about 'what might happen' and fear rears it's ugly head.

So how do you conquer fear? 

1. Acknowledge you are stepping into an area that is new or hard. You are pushing yourself.
2. If you feel anxiety, stay there, let your body feel the anxiety for a little while — it will fuel your next step.
3. You need to get back into a secure mode. How do you do that? You need the other four-letter word: "PLAN".

The best way to deal with fear is to have a PLAN. And not a 20-page plan. Sit down and write up a simple one-page plan with steps and activities on it. What happens?

• You begin to stop worrying about the future and stay in the present.
• You start to envision a gradual set of tasks to take you from where you are to where you need to be.
• You have a process to fall back on in case fear creeps into your head again.

"Do what you fear, and the death of fear is certain." - Anthony Robbins 

What do you FEAR? Do you have a PLAN to take care of it?

Image provided by Alex Talmon at Unsplash (Free - do whatever you want - hi-resolution photos).

5 Tips To Fix A Bad Relationship With Your Boss.

You started out so well. They hired you out of a field of thousands. They groomed you. They took you on trips, wined and dined you. They gave you the best projects and always had an open-door policy when it came to you. You were the Golden Child.

But then something went wrong. Not overnight, but over a series of months. You noticed it — they were paying more attention to your colleagues. Maybe an errant, small reprimand during a meeting. Or a meeting where you're asked not to attend. You feel you've been tossed on the rocky shoals at work.

In any event, you're getting the feeling your relationship has soured with your boss. How do you repair it?

1. Sit down and figure out what might be wrong.

This is your first step — assess the situation, the environment, your performance, and changes in the current organization. Did your boss get more responsibility? A new project? More team members? Is the company suddenly going through hard times? Did it miss it's targets for the quarter/year? Is your division/department going through a restructuring?

People's personalities and behaviors change when their environments change. If there is increased pressure on your boss, be sure it will trickle down to you in one way or another. More work, more pressure, and less face time.

If this is the case . . . ask if you can help them with their workload. Be there for them as a friend to listen. Help them with their pressure and above all, don't add to their problems. If you do, you will find it unpleasant.

2. Kick up your performance.

After you've assessed the situation, start working HARDER. Get things done quicker, stay later/come in earlier, be more communicative with your peers and team. Start delivering earlier on stated deadlines. Ask for more work. Figure out how you can put your performance into hyperdrive (not forever, just for a little while) to show your boss you can help out and deliver.

If this is the case . . . show them what you can REALLY do. 

3. Step up your formal communication with your boss.

I don't mean informal drive-by's at their office door. Begin to deliver regular communications of your progress — not long 'War & Peace' manifestos  but short and concise status reports on what you've accomplished, what you are working on, and what you will deliver in the next few weeks/months. Stepping up your communication will let your boss know you're still around and they'll see you are making accelerated progress on your responsibilities.

If this is the case . . . send them a weekly/bi-weekly/monthly email outlining your accomplishments and projects on deck. If they are busy or distracted, this is a simple and easy way for them to keep abreast of your work. Keep it short — one page max!

4. Ask a trusted colleague what might be wrong.

This is a tough one — but if your relationship is rocky, speak with a trusted friend to see if it's you or your boss. Sometimes they see things that you can't (blind spots). Your behavior might have changed, or you might have said the wrong thing during a meeting, or treated a client the wrong way. You think things are fine — but your relationship is not as strong as it used to be.

If this is the case . . . set up a lunch with your colleague and gracefully broach the subject with them. Say something like, "I've notice John is hard to figure out lately — are you seeing what I'm seeing?" or "Do you have the same face-time with Susan that you had six months ago? I almost never get the chance to meet with her lately."

5. If all else fails, talk to your boss.

This is the hardest, but most direct way to get to the bottom of the situation. A warning, do not, and I repeat, do not in any way make it THEIR fault. That will start the conversation off on the wrong foot — they will immediately become defensive and you will bear the brunt of their wrath.

If this is the case . . . start out by asking about them — how are things, haven't seen you around, etc. Then add, "Can I help in any way?" Most of the time, your boss will recognize they have been uncommunicative or unduly harsh and will try to open up a bit. If not, move forward and see if there is something you've done in the past that might have upset the applecart. "I just wanted to see if you approved on how I solved the Penske situation — was it to your satisfaction?" Start to probe — ultimately they will open up.

If all else fails — request a formal meeting to discuss your performance and to get feedback. It might be painful, but you might find they have no issues with your performance (and actually might say you're knocking it out of the park). At that point, open up and say you feel that your relationship is a bit distant and what can you do to improve it.

Good luck!

Image provided by Jay Wennington at Unsplash! (Free - do whatever you want images)

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Life Hacks To Make Your Work Day Easier.

Sometimes, it's hard enough to get through the entire day. So I've research a number of psychological business 'life hacks' to help you accelerate the painful portions of your day and make them a little bit brighter. Always listen and find people's soft spots. Instead of being confrontational, be kind and also play those points. What they don't like, don't like to hear, what they like to eat, to do, to listen to. One minute of listening will open the gates to whatever you want to do with that person.

Compliment first. Sometimes I have conferences with parents and they come in on the defense. I find that complimenting them right away helps to ease into conversation and allows me to dominate more of the conversation. This helps in many other situations as well.

Get things done. Pretend you have a 5 minute deadline for just about anything. You'd be amazed what you can get done IN A HURRY. Shit that would have normally taken you a week.

Look good. If you praise someone to another person, that person is likely to attribute the positive qualities you mentioned to you. I remembered this one when my boss, during a performance evaluation, used the same 3 positive words to describe me that I'd used to describe a coworker a couple of months earlier.

Do you have a rival? Or just someone who seems to dislike you, ask them for a favor. It will completely overhaul their outlook. This is known as the Ben Franklin effect as he documented it quiet thoroughly with the delegate from Delaware.

Someone yelling at you? When someone is having a breakdown, even if they are targeting you and verbally attacking you, don't make yourself the victim. Listen to what they say, and speak to them calmly and rationally. Once they are calmed down, tell them how it made you feel and how they may have been in the wrong. When people are having a breakdown, their emotions have full control of them and you letting your emotions take over is only going to make things worse. Just remember, if someone is acting this way, its not to hurt you, its because they feel hurt. And they will be much more willing to admit it if you treat them as the victim and yourself as the offender. At least until they calm down.

Want to make friends? If you want someone to like you in any given situation try not to wholly disagree with their opinions. Instead, initially show some resistance to their statement(s) and as time progresses, begin to show them that you are coming around to their idea/ that perhaps you have changed your view. The fact that they believe they have changed you opinion something positive about your interaction that they won't forget.

Want to be attractive? Wear red. For women, the color red makes them exponentially more attractive. Research has shown that men will go to great lengths to do things for a woman in red that they would not do otherwise like give her money or even carry her across the street.

Interview body language. So something that we do that we don't realize is mirror the body language of people that we like, like our friends. If they sit crossed legged, we will. If they touch their face, we will. This goes back to the subconscious will to be more like the people that we respect. You can kind of "force" this though, say in an interview. Put a conscious effort into mirroring the body posture of your interviewer, but don't be obvious about it. Be nice and subtle. This will trick their mind into thinking they like you. After all, you are doing similar things with your body, why not!

Get them to talk about themselves. People are selfish and they love talking about what they do. Ask your interviewer as many questions about what they do for work and really listen. They will walk away from the interview in a good mood because they got to talk about themselves and they will then think that the interview went well.

Schedule meetings as early as possible. There's a ton of cognitive psychology research about the primacy effect which essentially states that items are more memorable if they are presented earlier. So if you're meeting with someone where the person will literally be in meetings all day, you will be more memorable if you go first. If you are unable to be first go last. Similarly, there is research about the recency effect, which states that items are also memorable if they are presented last, though the primacy effect is more reliable. Just try not to be stuck in the middle.

Are you debating a position? Don't give your stance first. Give your argument. In some self interest research that I did myself in my undergrad, I found that your persuasiveness is fragile and dependent on your social identity. For example, if you came out and say "I'm an atheist and this is what I believe," you are already seen as less persuasive and more biased because people already know why you are arguing what you're arguing; you have something to gain by convincing people. You're an atheist. What you should do is not say you're an atheist at all. Say "this is what I believe..." Because people don't have an assumption already in their mind, they will be more likely to view you as less biased. Bonus points if you're on the opposite side. For example, a conservative arguing for gay rights is going to be viewed as very persuasive and not biased at all because they literally have nothing to gain from holding that viewpoint while a homosexual arguing for gay rights does have something to gain and thus is seen as more biased.

Have to make or present an important choice? People will incline to chose the last choice presented to them. In her case, this worked because asking "Should I take a note (for said person) or will you call back yourself?" would lead people to calling back themselves much more often making her work easier. Now this doesn't work with all questions ("Do you want to go to Venice or Rome for holidays?") but it usually works with questions where the choice isn't that important. "Do you want to eat pizza or takeout Chinese?" is another good one. Put the choice you want them to take as the last one and pray they take the bait. Another protip: DON'T let them know you do this, or they may think you're putting your choice as the last one when that ain't necessarily true.

Want more confidence? You can affect your testosterone levels and convey mroe confidence by, simply, streching out and making yourself as big as possible for periods of 2 minutes! Watch this video. It WORKS!

Information for this article gathered from Reddit.

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Are You Feeling Guilty At Work?

I'm feeling guilty today. The funny thing is . . . I shouldn't. Every Tuesday, like clockwork, I attend my networking/sales team meeting with approximately 50 people.

It's called BNI (Business Networking International), a worldwide organization where businesspeople meet to learn about their services and deliver hot referrals (CLIENTS) each week. I find it powerful for my business (it delivers 40-45% of my clients each year) and wouldn't miss it for the world. In fact, if you have a business or a product to sell, BNI is THE place to go to increase your bottom line.

What happened?

Today, I'm missing my weekly meeting. I had to double-book a client over my meeting and could not schedule it for any other time this week. They HAD to meet at this time. And I did ALL the right things a BNI member should do:

I notified the leadership team of my absence.

I replace my open spot for the week with a great substitute who will do my commercial.

I let the visitor host team know of my sub so they could list them on our weekly roster.

And I did it all on-time, prior to our meeting.

I still feel guilty. I feel that I'm letting my colleagues down even though I've taken all the steps to ensure my absence is covered this week. Why do I feel guilty?

I feel like I'm letting my BNI colleagues down.

I feel that I'm missing out on something good.

That regular burst of enthusiasm I receive from attending will not be there this week.

Honestly, I shouldn't feel guilty. NOT ONE BIT. Why? Guilt is all about the PAST. And guess what? There's nothing I can do about it. NOTHING. It's in the past.

I've made a decision, I've prepared my absence — I've taken all the steps to ensure I shouldn't feel guilt about missing my meeting. So it's time to confront my guilt and realize I have to live in the present and move on from this 'fake' feeling. Why?

It's holding me back — I'm focusing on something that really doesn't matter.

I'm expending mental and physical energy towards a belief that is not true.

I'm not focusing on the present or planning for the future. This is where I can make serious progress towards my goals.

So the next time you feel GUILTY, remember it's all in the past and there's nothing you can really do about it. Take that guilt and repurpose its energy into the present and future. You will find yourself working faster, better, and with more enthusiasm.

Guilt is a mechanism for us to remember past mistakes so we don't repeat them — don't let it paralyze you.

I'D LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR GUILT AT WORK. LET ME KNOW BELOW.

Hitting A Wall In Your Career? You Need A Breakthrough.

It's tough today. It’s difficult when everything is coming at you. Hard to think. Hard to act. Hard to react. As they always say — the first step is always the hardest.

It’s hard when everything is coming at you. Hard to think. Hard to act. Hard to react.

You’re constantly focused on getting the work done — satisfying your boss, your clients . . . just keeping your job!

It’s now time for you to step back and look at the long view:

Where you’ve been

Where you are

Where you want to go

This isn’t time consuming, but it isn’t easy. The only thing I ask is that you don’t give into the “Executive ADD” that creeps in when we try something that is new and difficult.

“Oh, this won’t work” or “Let me just put this down for a second and I’ll get back to it tomorrow.”

Stop doing that. Now.

Like the title to this page says: “Take the first step and let the tide take you.” But do

You’re constantly focused on getting the work done — satisfying your boss, your clients . . . just keeping your career going!

It’s now time for you to step back and look at the long view:

Where you’ve been... Where you are... Where you want to go...

This isn’t time consuming, but it ain't easy. I only ask is that you don’t capitulate to “Career ADD” which creeps in when we try something new and difficult.

“Oh, this won’t work” or “Let me just put this down for a second and I’ll get back to it tomorrow.” Or even the "I've done this before and it never worked."

Stop doing that. Now.

Take the first step and let the momentum take you. But don’t stop.

I have something to help you — I've used it with thousands of clients. And guess what? IT WORKS.

The BEST part? It's FREE. Download Breakthrough right now. It's a life-changing solution.

You're welcome.

How Successful Leaders Stay Successful.

It's simple. This prescription is easy to understand and execute — but for some reason, for most people, it's really difficult and complex. So here it is — 

Launch. Declare Victory. Move On. 

Work is made up of a bunch of tasks, activities, projects, initiatives, and deliverables. We work and manage them day in and day out. Unfortunately, we sometimes forget that many of these things we do have a critical half-life. We need to complete them and get them out the door ASAP.

But we don't do that. We keep working on them, we can make them better. We can push them to do a little bit more. In addition, we are sometimes afraid of releasing our deliverables out into the world for fear of failure. So we procrastinate.

So here's my prescription for success (taught to me years ago by a valued boss):

Launch.

Get it out. Set a deadline and stick to it. Put plans in place to make sure nothing can stand in the way of launching, releasing, or completing your deliverable. It could be as big as a new product or as small as a simple presentation. Your job is to get it out and DONE.

Declare Victory.

This one is critical. Build into your plan the ability to put a positive spin on everything you accomplish. Why? Because the typical human being tends to do the exact opposite — they criticize, condemn, and complain about what they deliver. How it's not ready, how you could've done better, how you missed the delivery date by a few seconds.

We all do it. So to be successful, do the exact opposite. Declare victory — let everyone know it's out, it's a success, build up enthusiasm, get people excited. Let them know about all the great things it will do and how it will change their lives.

Move On.

This is the most important part — once you declare victory, move on to something else. Don't rest on your laurels — your last deliverable will start to smell after awhile. So many people launch something or complete a huge project and for the next 3-6 months, bask in the glory and slowly move from delivery to on-going maintenance.

Once you declare victory, move on to something new ASAP. Too many people fall into the trap of sticking around too long at the party and they suddenly become the 'guest that wouldn't leave'. So move on as soon as you can (if you have a hard time doing this, elect someone to push you out the door, hand you your car keys, and drive home).

Why is this a prescription for success? Because it clearly positions you to deliver quickly, market your success, and move on to another great project. Too many times we let nostalgia, inertia, and pure laziness to keep us back when we need to move forward.

Where Are All The Great Careers? Hiding Right Here.

We all know the common and famous careers out there. Did you know there are many great career paths that are 'hidden' from the normal news mainstream? Careers we probably know exist if we really thought about it, but we tend to forget them when we look at the entire career picture.

Put on your seatbelt — here we go!

Welding - From many schools, you can graduate with a welding degree. The average salary for a welding engineer is $48K to $101K. That's not too good for some people, but if you had a wife who worked the same job as well, and only spent half of each others pay check. Hey, you'd have 1 million in 10 years.

School Administration - Most people think education degrees can only lead to being a teacher but if you get your masters in administration you will be a principal making well over six figures.

Technical Writing - There is a wide variety of sub-specializations which lean more toward engineering, how-to's, or investigations. Even at a little company, there's more random stuff than you would think (DNA, DEA, bacteria, electrical engineering, IT, etc.) Most get a BA, but people who just have AAs that work in the field.

The U.S. Coast Guard - Most people don't know that it's an actual military service or that it even exists. All the military benefits and living by the ocean or water your entire career with very few exceptions.

Bioinformatics - Seriously, perfect for young people who know how to use computers and love looking at a screen all day. Why not do that working for Pharma or the Government? $100k+ entry-level if you set yourself up the right way.

Real Estate Appraisal - Combines an interest in real estate and allows for a guaranteed paycheck. Paid on a type of "commission" basis, but you  earn a percentage of the fee a client pays the company (most clients are banks, at least at my company). So unlike a lot of sales positions, you TRULY make as much money (to a point) as you'd like. Because you're paid on "commission" or fee split as we call it, your schedule can be busy or quiet, and you're also practically guaranteed work.

Car Sales - If you get into the game, you can quickly become a finance or desk manager making $120+ a year. If you keep moving up you can triple that as a General Manager. If you work hard enough and own your own dealership you can rake it in without doing much anymore.

The Army - I don't think people realize that Army will pay for your ENTIRE COLLEGE fund, send you to a great school, and offer the best benefits in the United States arsenal. Also their MOS's transfer fantastically into the civilian world. You will always have a leg up on people for being in the military. And if you're worried about dying out there, note that you're statistically more likely to drive than you are going to war.

Power Line Technician - Everyone needs power, even in recessions. A past client of mine makes about $150k a year and his job is not dependent on the economy.

Physician's Assistant - I know a lot of young people want to be a doctor, but PA's get a lot of medical training and can function as near autonomous primary care physicians in the right setting, or essentially as permanent resident physicians. Doctor's love having you around; once you're in a practice long enough, I've heard many doctor's will give your opinions equal if not more weight than other physicians. The pay is also excellent; I've heard people say it's half the work/training for 90% of the pay of a physician - it's food for thought.

Electrofishing - A pal of mine performs fisheries research in Canada and gets to catch fish all day with electricity to determine populations, tag the fish and release them back into the wild. Spend all summer in the mountains and write reports on your findings in the winter. BEST JOB EVER.

Low Voltage Technician (a.k.a. Satellite / Cable guy/gal) - You're out on your own, virtually unsupervised after training. See different sites every day. Decent career path to management or senior tech. New technology all the time. And as much talk as there is about cord cutting, a vast majority of households still have some form of copper to their home for tv or internet. They make more than some of my friends who have degrees, and there's no certificate or college program required. Show an interest, and your local cable, satellite or phone company will probably hire you. It's a recession-resistant career, and you can find work anywhere in the world.

Railroading - Railroads are hiring like crazy. You don't need a degree for most of the jobs in the field. If you do want a degree they'll pay for you to go to school once you've been with the company for a year. It's easy to move up and they don't pay into social security - they have a completely separate retirement fund. A 20-year old locomotive engineer makes around $100k a year with no prior work experience.

Math - Take math as far as it can possibly go, no matter what your major is, because to be an EXPERT in any field means to know the math behind it. You can do EVERYTHING with advanced mathematics. Even if you don't become a scientist, at the very least you'll quickly be a department or regional manager.

Optical Engineering - 100% job placement, 6-figure average starting salaries with 4 years of schooling/training, entirely because of the mismatch in demand/supply of qualified people. Designing and building optical systems for everything from your SLR camera's lens, to MRI medical imaging, to Heads-up displays like the Oculus Rift. The best part about it is how diverse the field is - a mixture of engineering, science, computer programming, and hands-on fabrication trade skills all centered around simple trigonometric equations - it's mostly triangles. The work is fun and the pay is great no matter what level of schooling you get, whether it's a Bachelors, Masters or even PhD. There are three premier optics programs in the US at the UArizona, URochester, and CREOL - but plenty of other smaller programs around the US and the world.

Welding - Welders are in great demand and will make $80k starting out and have the potential to be making over $100k with experience. A friend of mine is a chemical plant manager and he said that he pays his engineers $110k and he is worried that they aren't paying enough.

HVAC - Heating and Air. It's a skilled trade which requires minimal physical labor and pays $75-$95K starting wages. Takes 2 years to get your education and the courses are dirt cheap and the jobs are in huge demand. Employers are asking job seekers to join the organization, they  pay for the education, and they'll wait for them to get certified.

Food Science - It's a growing industry because as the population increase more and more people must eat, and everyone has to eat! Because of this, it's very rewarding, and if you weren't aware, the food industry has lots of cash. A client of mine is paid exponentially more than many of my friends do, and it's only her first year out of college. In fact, she's well ahead of the average US salary. Additionally, the employment rate is near 100%, and for graduating students in food science have 100% job placement (which few majors can say). Also, it's one of those majors that will never trend or be posted on Yahoo as a growing area, so the market never gets flooded for food scientists and they are always in high demand.

Patent Analyst - Most patent analysts love their job. They wake up every morning with a new analytic problem to solve and get paid for using their brain power. They learn about the newest tech while it's still in a 'skunkworks' phase and try to describe how they will change the world. What better job is there?

Industrial/Organizational Psychologist - Amazingly great job that lets you branch into academia, organizations, or consulting. Allows you to focus on different aspects of organizations - restructuring, selection, retention, leadership development, etc. Can also go into "Data Scientist" roles. These pay $100K-$250K starting off.

Actuary - Only if you're good with math. You need a bachelor's degree - you can start working and taking tests to become fully certified. While you work, you get time on the job to study for exams. Pay depends on how many exams you have passed. If you have all of the exams completed, minimum pay of around $150k. You can make well more than that and there is lots of room for promotion. Probably the easiest and fastest route to becoming a VP of a company if you're a hard worker.

Image provided by bpsusf at Flickr. Info gleaned from research on Reddit.

How To Run A Meeting People Like To Attend.

Impossible! Meetings suck! How can I run a meeting people actually like to attend? Most people don't realize how bad meetings reflect on their leadership, management, and reputation. A bad meeting can hurt you for weeks, months, or even years (sometimes FOREVER). With a few simple steps, you can virtually ensure a meeting which will please all attendees.

Here are some tips:

1. Make it short.

I always try to halve my meeting. If I need an hour, can I do it in 30 minutes? Two hours . . . 60 minutes? The shorter the meeting, the faster it will go (duh!) which is a boon for all the attendees. Stick to the topic at hand, don't try to do too much, keep the blabbers down to a minimum and you can get out of there in record time.

2. Start with the end in mind.

Have a goal. Most meetings stink because they slowly meander through issues, tasks, results, or presentations. Figure out EXACTLY what needs to happen, what are the deliverables, and ensure each attendee is prepared to make decisions quickly. Have an agenda and stick to it. Everyone will thank you profusely.

3. Prepare.

I can't tell you how many meetings I've attended where the organizer had absolutely no idea why we were there. Or they came late, had no agenda, let the meeting go WAY off-course, etc. Sit down and architect the meeting — it should take you no longer than five minutes. Layout how you will start, what you're going to present, what might happen, and what you want to walk away with.

4. Be visual, auditory, and kinesthetic.

People absorb information in different ways — if you are speaking another language, they won't get it. So make sure you hit their visual (eyes), auditory (ears), and kinesthetic (touch - hug them!). My modus operandi: Use slides (visual), present by speaking (auditory), and have a backup sheet of paper (kinesthetic).

5. Arrive early.

I hate when the organizer is late to their own meeting. Be there ahead of time to ensure the room is organized, there are enough chairs, the LCD projector and your laptop are ready to roll, the temp is perfect, your agendas are in front of each chair, etc. If there is a problem or emergency, you have time to take care of it. I usually book important meeting rooms 15-30 minutes prior to the meeting to ensure no one is there and I have time to set up.

6. Greet attendees.

Welcome them and get them prepared for the meeting. Most organizers are rushing around doing everything in #5 — stand by the door and welcome people as they arrive — it adds a certain touch of professionalism. Trust me here. Make sure you select a conference room which is tailored to your requirements, this way, you have everything you need.

7. Keep it flowing.

You are in the command chair. Stick to the agenda, keep your eye on the time and shut down anyone who tries to make it longer, take over the meeting, or goes way off topic. Ask to take their inquiries off-line and get back on-point.

8. Try to only attempt a few deliverables.

Too many organizers try to stick ten pounds of sugar in a five pound bag. Be realistic about what you can accomplish and focus only on the most important facts, information, and decisions. The more you try to add, you increase the chances of going off-course.

9. End early.

This is my gift to the attendees . . . TIME. Try to end 5-10 minutes early — don't try to 'fill-up' the entire hour. If the meeting is winding down, close it quickly and get people on their way. You will get a favored reputation that you run efficient and on-point meetings. People will like to attend them.

10. Stay after the meeting.

Stick around to thank people for attending, answer any questions people might have, and follow up on any errant requests from the attendees. The more face time you give at the end, the faster the meeting will go.

If you do these simple steps in each of your meetings, you will develop a solid reputation as an accomplished presenter. People will enjoy coming to your meetings and your reputation as a professional will soar.

Top 10 Reasons Why You're Not Getting A Job.

As a business and career coach, I run into so many different people every day. I attend conferences and events, I run workshops and webinars, and I host team masterminds for all types of professionals. And guess what? When I talk to the unemployed, I've heard all the excuses why you don't have a job. Here are the top ten realities of your job search today:

1. You're waiting for the phone to ring or the limo to pull up to your house and whisk you off to your new position.

This is my #1 pet peeve when I host job-search workshops. People say they are busy, they're sending out resumes, but the reality is they are mentally waiting for a knight in shining armor to whisk them away to a new cushy position. Guest what . . . it's never going to happen. NEVER.

Unless you're a recently fired CEO with massive connections to firms who want to hire you and subsequently ruin their company, no one is going to call and no one is driving up with a black stretch limo. Once you realize you are on your own and only YOU can change your situation, it's time for a mental ass-kick to get your head on straight.

What To Do: You want an mental ass-kick? Start listening to motivational speakers to keep your mental energy level up and constant. Check out Zig Ziglar, Dale Carnegie, Jeffrey Gitomer, and my favorite Bennie Hsu at Get Busy Living Podcast. He's the best!

2. You rarely go out.

You get up at 9 AM, you probably don't take a shower, you get dressed in your old geriatric Adidas sweatsuit, and sit in front of your laptop. WRONG!

What To Do: Get up at 5 AM, go for a walk/run outside, take a shower, and get dressed in real clothes. You don't like it? TOUGH. This is your workday and for the next 8-10 hours, I am your drill sergeant and you will deliver 110% looking for a job every Monday through Friday. Set up a schedule which takes you outside every single day. Meet people for coffee, hit the library, go to the gym, walk around the park. Strike up conversations with people — you never know who you will meet.

3. You check the web for postings, send out a few resumes, and watch Ellen, Rachael, and Jerry the rest of the day.

Unemployment is not a vacation. You have to attack your job search like any project you've ever delivered at work.

What To Do: You have to:

• Focus on the marketplace - What companies are doing well? Where are the growth areas? Who are the movers and shakers?
• Analyze your attributes against your competition - Do a SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats) analysis on YOU. Figure out how you leverage your strengths and opportunities.
• Develop key targets to go after - Analyze your commuting radius, find out all the potential industries and organizations within your circle, and begin to make a hit list.
• Execute - Go after each one incrementally in a cascade pattern to ensure you are not inundated with tasks, but your search is progressing in a healthy fashion.

4. Your industry has changed.

You actually thought people were going to buy slide-rules FOREVER. Yes, that's right, you're industry is changing. And guess what? Everyone's industry is changing. Some are morphing into other forms, some are merging, many are shrinking, and a lot are just plum going out of business. If you thought you could keep your job or profession for 30 years, I have a DeLorean to sell you.

What To Do: Figure out where your industry is going and either stick around for the very bumpy ride or jump off at the station for the next train. Get to thee library, my dear young minstrel and start understanding what is really happening in the marketplace. Read the WSJ, Medium, BusinessWeek, Fast Company, Inc, and Foundr. Also meeting with industry luminaries doesn't hurt either.

5. You're too old.

Where did the time go? You were having so much fun as an executive in a corner office working on strategy and mergers, you never saw the axe coming for you until it was too late. Now you're 55 and no one wants you. Let me rephrase that — no 20-year old in HR wants you. The minute they do the college graduate math in their head (or on their calculator), your résumé is flying faster than a 767 into the circular file. And the funny thing is you keep doing it.

What To Do: Stop repeating something which doesn't work and expecting something different. You have to get out of the HR/Recruiter trap and move up the ladder and meet/engage/schmooze the hiring managers. Go to industry events, reach out to them via LinkedIn/Twitter, and google their name to get to know them. Then reach out and try to meet them.

6. You're too young.

Where did the time go? You were just in college wowing them with your 4.0 GPA and now no one will take your calls because you have no experience.

What To Do: It's time for you to get some experience! You need to call in every chip on the poker table of life and have them connect you with possible paid intern/entry level positions. Let's get real — you might have a little bit of knowledge, but your don't have the experience to hit deadlines consistently, run a meeting, handle an angry client, manage a boss, or run a complex project. You have to take a small hit position/salary-wise and build up those talents before you really hit the big leagues of life.

7. You're unrealistic about your position and your salary.

"Look, I was Vice President of Strategic Initiatives with a yearly base salary of $275K. Why doesn't anyone want me?"

What To Do: There are a finite number of positions out there which might fit your position/salary requirements, but you will never find them in time. I know, you might run into them, but most likely, NOT. You have to be a bit flexible on the Who/What/Where/How Much in the current marketplace. Try to broaden your scope and see what else is out there. It might not be a VP position, or one drowning in strategy. It might be a bit lower than $275K a year — but then again, it's higher than the $0/year you're pulling in now (great tax benefits though).

8. You have a glass-half-empty mentality.

No one likes a whiner. I just spoke with a prospect this week who could not stop talking about all the bad bosses and decisions they've made in the past 10 years. The first rule of your job search: Never, ever, say bad things about your past. Not only does it cloud anyone's opinion of you, it brings your mental state down into the basement.

What To Do: Start imagining what life would be like if you had that wonderful position RIGHT NOW. Where would you be? Who would you be working with? What would you be doing? How would you get there. Stop thinking and feeling guilty about the past and start preparing for your glorious future. Get your head half-full immediately.

9. You're afraid of Thinking Big and reaching out to the real power-brokers.

No one is going to think big for you (except me). You hamstring your search and actions by being risk-averse. You're afraid of rejection and will never put yourself in a position of actually touching key movers and shakers in your industry. No . . . you will continue to interview with 20-year-old HR reps who text more than they think and wonder why you don't have a killer position.

What To Do: Get a piece of paper and write down what would be your PERFECT job. Now actualize it in your universe — find those companies who fit the bill and reach out to the key people who run those positions. The funny thing is . . . these same people are always on the lookout for new talent. You're just not putting yourself onto their radar.

10. You've given up.

You've tried again and again to get a job offer, an interview or even a solid connection and it seems the cards are stacked against you. It's been years since you've worked and you're draining your savings account to keep your household afloat.

What To Do: You can always try again. Take a different tack, work on an alternate strategy, reach out to new people. In fact, I just worked with a client who was unemployed for two years and within three months, he had a number of offers and took an incredible job. You never know where your next break will occur.

Free image provided by iStockPhoto.

How To Survive In A High Performance Workplace.

Been there, done that. Because of the economy and marketplace, many seemingly normal environments are slowly turning into ‘high-performance’ workplaces (HPW). In addition, if you are working at a startup or within a certain industry (PR, Advertising, Tech, etc.), you might encounter this situation all the time. Here are some tips to help you understand, cope, and succeed in your career:

Compare You vs. Them. Do you fit in this environment? This is usually the first question I ask when clients are not fitting in at their place of work. I first get a good idea about who they are and what a typical day involves and then compare/contrast it with the demands/expectations of their organization. If the two don’t fit, we see how big the chasm is and then decide on next steps. Sometimes, you need to leave.

You are not going to know everything. This is one of the biggest issues many executives run into. In HPW, things/people/projects are moving at light-speed. Decisions need to be made in one-tenth the time and sometimes you’re put on the spot by your boss or peers. You are going to catch yourself saying, “I know that.” or “I’ll handle that”, while deep in the recesses of your head you know you have no idea what they are talking about. This is huge with new employees and young workers. Be honest. Say, “I don’t know,” or “I don’t know, but I can find out.” rather than lying. I find it’s usually worse if you say you do know it and you screw it up. Again, tell the truth.

Streamline everything you do. This is huge — your job is to streamline everything you do to allow you to take on more responsibility and projects. Constantly look at all the elements and see which ones can go away or can be reduced in size, time, or resources. If you do this consistently, you will be regarded as invaluable to the organization and fit in perfectly.

Make things happen NOW. Don’t wait until tomorrow — what can you do right now to move your project, task, or activity along? Who do you need to call? This leads into:

Sit on people to get their part done. This is hard for many people. When working with your peers and team members, it might be difficult to move them faster than their highest gear. Guess what? It’s their job. We tend to forget this — many positions within an organization cater to internal customers, like you. Be demanding, listen to their excuse, but then PUSH. Ask for a due date and hold them to it. Check in before the deadline to see their progress. If they become an obstacle, go around them. I do this ALL the time.

Practice excellent time management. You also need to keep your act in order. If you are sloppy time-wise, you’ll never get anything done on time and that is a death-warrant in a HPW. Figure out some behavior change — Franklin Planner, Pomodoro, Getting Things Done, etc. (just Google: Time Management)— stick to it and use it faithfully. If you don’t, you’ll find yourself falling farther and farther away from the pack and you begin to forget/drop important tasks.

How do you cope in your high performance workplace?

Image provided by SuperFantastic at Flickr.

How To Deal With Stress At Work.

As a coach, I deal with client stress issues all the time. It comes with the job. I  help my clients by focusing in on three simple philosophies from a book called Self-Powerment — written by Dr. Faye Mandell, an incredible woman and friend (go out and buy her book TODAY!).

Let’s get down to the facts: There are three stressors which tend to hit us when we least expect it — Fear, Anger and Guilt. What Faye tries to do is to get you back into your original human emotional needs we all experience — Security, Being In Control, and Feeling Adequate.

Here’s how your body and mind work (this will sound repetitive, it is, but stay with me):

Security

We all need to feel some sense of  security at home, on the street and at work. If your security is threatened, your natural feeling moves from security to anxiety. This is your body telling you something is wrong with your natural state of security. But it’s okay — your job is to understand you are anxious and you have to move back to some sort of security, by thinking of options or taking action.

Unfortunately, we let our brain take over and let our feelings ‘corrupt’ our anxiety and turn it into FEAR. Our mind has taken our present need and projected it in the FUTURE. We are no longer living in the present, but fearing for the future.

Example: Fear of speaking in public. You have a speech to give and you begin to develop stories about how you will fail and the audience's reaction.

Being In Control

We all need to be in control at some level in our lives.If we get out of control, our emotions move from Conrol to Frustration. Again, this is your body telling you something is wrong - you’re not in control of something you usually control. You need to realize something (or someone) is frustrating you and you have get back and take control of the situation.

Once again, we let our brain take over and let our feelings ‘corrupt’ our frustration and turn it into ANGER. Our mind has taken our present need and has allowed OTHER PEOPLE & THINGS to take control. We are no longer in control of our own life, we are letting other people and things take over.

Example: Your kids. They mess up the kitchen, you get frustrated, and your mind moves to anger. It happens to me ALL the time (they're boys).

Feeling Adequate

Feeling adequate is a strong emotional need in our lives. If we suddenly feel inadequate, we quickly start feeling disappointed or sad. Again, it's fine — your sadness is telling you to move back and regain your adequacy in one way or another.

And once again, we let our brain take over and let our feelings ‘corrupt’ our adequacy and turn it into GUILT. Our mind has taken our present need and has projected it in the PAST. We are no longer living in the present, but worrying about the past.

Example: Someone says something you don’t quickly grasp. You begin to feel sad you never received a graduate degree, and you feel guilty.

Got it? Dr. Mandell’s position is to move quickly from the past, future, & people/things and get into the “I AM” or present state.

The way I interpret it: You can’t change the past, it’s difficult to change people/things, and stop worrying about the future — live in the present and take action.

What do you do when you are insecure, not in control, or feeling inadequate at work?

Image provided by Jonas Nilsson Lee at Unsplash.

5 Easy Ways To Give Great Customer Service.

I ordered new running shoes from Zappos the other day. If you've ever ordered from Zappos — you'll know they sometimes don't have the best prices. But they do deliver the best customer service.

When I say "CUSTOMER SERVICE", it isn't specific to business owners. If you work in corporate, CUSTOMER SERVICE is critical — you have CUSTOMERS above you, along side you, and below you. When you work at an organization, it's formal Human Resources name is "interpersonal communication".

To survive, you need to keep your customers engaged, happy, and wanting more of your products and services. So without further ado — here they are:

1. Deliver WOW during the whole process.

From the initial screens, to the multiple angles, to the highly-descriptive videos Zappos makes you feel right at home choosing your merchandise. Everything is clear, and open and they really don't try to hard-sell you. In addition, they promote their core values at the bottom of every page to let the customer know what philosophies are guiding every business interaction.

When I say WOW, I want you to look at everything you do for your boss, customer, or client. At every juncture, how can you do a little bit better? How can you elevate every touchpoint and anticipate their needs? How can you reach out and make every interaction more streamlined and pleasurable?

2. Make the customer feel special by personalizing the process.

Zappos remembers ALL of your purchases. A year after I bought a pair of Merrell Jungle Mocs, I received an email to let me know it's been a year and if I'd like to buy another pair. Although my pair is in good shape and I didn't need another pair just yet — the thought of receiving a card is impressive.

When was the last time you reached out to your current client base to remind them of a service or product? How about a new service or product? How about a simple card appreciating their business? You can do almost anything and make the customer feel special.

3. Be responsive. 4. If something goes wrong, ask questions and listen. 5. If you screwed up, give them a token of appreciation.

I had a slight snafu with one of my orders — I ordered it on the regular Zappos site and not the VIP site (we order a lot of shoes). The end result — shoes I thought were arriving that day were delayed by a few days. On the phone, the Zappos representative was helpful and was able to expedite the shipment. In addition, they sent me an email with a $25 credit to apply to my next purchase. WOW.

If something goes wrong — fix it immediately. Don't wait for it to 'go away'.

First, you need to be instantly accessible to allow your clients to access you. All of my clients have a direct line to me — so they can either call or email me. If it's an emergency, I get back the them ASAP. If it's just a question, 24 hours is fine. But I am there — they don't sit in my inbox for weeks or are relegated to my voicemail for eternity. I get back to them. And they can access me instantly.

Second, if there is something wrong, ask questions and then LISTEN. Most people try to fix the problem without listening to the entire story. Your customer first and foremost want you to empathize with their situation. So your job is to ask questions for clarification and listen to them until they run out of steam. Then empathize with them — "I'm so sorry to hear that happened." or "Let's see what we can do to solve your problem."

Finally, if YOU screwed up — apologize and give them a token of appreciation. A discount, a gift, flowers, take them out to lunch, whatever. A small token of acknowledgement and a gift will not only go the distance, they will be your customer forever.

"If You Don't Build Your Dream . . . Someone Else Will Hire You To Build Theirs."

A number of years ago, I turned 40 and for my birthday, a good buddy from college sent me a book. I read that book in two days and it totally changed my vision, my perspective and my life. That book was "Tuesdays With Morrie". If you haven't read it, pick it up TODAY. It taught me that life is fleeting and to spend each day enjoying life, your work, your family, and your friends. I spent too much time worrying at my job and seeing too many projects deferred by bad management. I experienced too many manager making too many bad decisions based on emotions and politics and not on facts and ethics. I realized I was no longer doing what I really wanted to do.

It took three 'insights' to help me realize my situation and deliver a solution.

My first insight was Tuesdays With Morrie.

My second insight was signing up for the Dale Carnegie course and attending all 12 sessions. Not only did I meet 50 wonderful professionals from all walks of life, I had an incredible instructor who helped me better understand my future career.

My third was hiring a coach to help me make the transition. He helped me rationalize the erratic fears of leaving a six-figure position for an unknown coaching practice that might fail. But he helped me understand what needed to be done, put goals and activities in place, and make the jump.

And many years later, I'm doing better every year — blowing away my past salaries and making more than I've ever dreamed. Yes — I have to work harder sometimes — but this is MY business. On the other hand, I am in COMPLETE CONTROL of my products, my promotions, what I write, what I do — and I have the flexibility many people wish for.

And the best part? I've helped hundreds of clients make the same jump from crazy corporate to owning their own business. And they hug and thank me every time they see me (they're my best cheerleaders).

So — take the plunge — step out of your comfort zone and start your own business. Come on in — the water's fine.

I leave you with Emerson, who also said (in Self Reliance): "In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts: they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty. Great works of art have no more affecting lesson for us than this. They teach us to abide by our spontaneous impression with good-humored inflexibility then most when the whole cry of voices is on the other side. Else, to-morrow a stranger will say with masterly good sense precisely what we have thought and felt all the time, and we shall be forced to take with shame our own opinion from another."

Image provided by Monika Majkowska at Unsplash.

Stupid Things People Do . . . Your Email.

Who loves their email? Lovin' those 150-200 emails you receive each day? I expect your answer to be "NO". But why do we put so much emphasis on it then? Why do we check it whenever we get a spare moment?

Why do we treat each email equally? That's STUPID.

Email is not a good communication platform. Actually, it's really not communicating - good communication happens in real-time and is between two or more people. How many misunderstood emails have you sent or received in your lifetime?

This is SMART:

Prioritize your email. Use Rules to assign colors to important emails (Red for the Boss or Clients, Blue for emails with you on the TO: line) and Gray for all other email. Trash any CC: email - trust me, it's not important.

Check your email 3 times a day. In the morning, after lunch, and right before you leave. Instead of responding by email - call. If there is something important or an emergency, they should call you.

Use the phone more often. Leave 20-30 second messages and only talk to someone for no longer than 3-5 minutes. If you need longer, set up a 10-15 minute meeting, no longer.

Stop by offices more often. You then control the time you talk. Make the 'drive-by' 3-5 minutes and then be off.

At the end of the day, email will suck the living daylights out of your productivity, motivation, and life. Trust me.

Love to hear your thoughts - comment below or email me anytime! - Rich

Image provided by In 30 Minutes Guides at Flickr.

How To Give A Good Compliment.

Here’s something I’ve found to help me open up conversations, give people a lift, and raise my self-esteem at the same time. There’s nothing like a warm, sincere compliment to make your day. Instead of waiting for one, why not give one out? Take it from me, the more you give, the more you find you’ll receive.

Make your compliment specific. “That necklace looks really good on you” makes a bigger impact compared to “you look really good today”. The more specific the better, it makes the person feel like you notice them.

Back up your compliment. Don’t just stop at “that necklace looks really good on you”. Your compliment becomes stronger when you say why you think so; “that necklace looks really good on you because it matches your eyes”.

Ask a question with your compliment. And if you want to use it as a conversational starter, ask a question about the subject of your compliment; “that necklace looks really good on you because it matches your eyes. Where did you find it?”.

Why Giving Compliments Raises Your Self-Esteem It takes confidence and self-esteem to notice good things about others and to make the first caring move to tell them about it.

When I first started giving compliments I was awkward and shy about it. I kept wondering if I’d offend them in some way or make people suspicious about what I wanted from them. I’ve since discovered that a sincere compliment is always a welcome boost to someone’s day. There will be those that reject it or will even argue with you, but that’s usually their problem and not yours. A compliment is like a gift, if someone doesn’t want your gift you’ll still end up owning it. The best way to accept one is also like a gift, just say ‘thank you’. You’ll also find when you start noticing good things about people, you’ll notice more good things about you too! And the more you do, the more your own self-esteem will grow.