How To Say Goodbye To Co-Workers On The Last Day Of Your Internship.

I work with a LOT of interns and they always have the BEST questions!

I thought I would give back to all the interns who have worked for me and have coached with me . . . here are some great responses (from colleagues) who experienced a classy goodbye from an intern:

Intern:

"You can say farewell to everyone individually, you can send a mass email with all of your contact information, or, what I recommend, do both."

Long-ago Intern, Now Employed:

"The ones you are familiar with, say goodbye, the ones you dont talk to, to hell with them, and to your boss give them wine/candy and a thank you card (they may want to hire you after that!)."

Current Intern:

"Most people will come in to your office and say something to you throughout the day. You can give a general "thank you so much for making me feel welcome and making this a great experience". You bring up specific instances when they helped you like "Thank you for teaching me all those Excel commands!" or refer to an inside joke you might share. I was always told "hopefully we'll see you around here full-time next year".

A Past Intern, Now an Executive:

"During one internship, I walked around throughout the afternoon and stopped to chat with each person and said goodbye. I wrote a personalized thank-you note to every employee I interacted with to thank them for the various things they did for me and left it at their desk at the end of the day. When I ran into coworkers and bosses later on, every one of them brought up those thank-you notes and said they were impressed and everyone was so excited to receive one."

So take the time and say goodbye personally and send a thank-you note. It works.

New Job Success Or Failure: Your First Day.

Here are some quick tips I give all of my clients prior to their first day on the job:

Prepare

This is a critical task for you and sets up every other thing you do for your first day. You need to get this done 24 hours prior to your first day.

• Get all of your paperwork together. Everything that needs to be signed, your license, passport, etc.
• Pick your clothes and make sure they look great. You will feel better if they are all laid out and ready to go.
• Polish (men) and touch up (ladies) your shoes - they need to look great.
• Make your lunch the day before.
• Set the timer on your coffeemaker so you wake up to hot coffee.

Meditate

Yes, meditate. When you get up or after your shower, sit on your bed, close your eyes, and relax. Say to yourself:

• I will do great. I have years of experience ready to burst out of me.
• They love me - they picked me over every other applicant.
• I won't screw up - I will ask questions when I am unsure.

Day One is always the hardest day - it is built up with anxiety and fear - meditation will help you get centered. Take 1-2 minutes for yourself.

Leave Early

If your commute is 30 minutes, leave 1 hour early. This is a new route, with new traffic patterns and unknown hazards. Give yourself ample commuting time to get there with enough buffer to ensure you are stress-free and ready to go. If you get there early, that's fine.

Arrive Early/Stay Late

It sends the right message to your superiors, peers and team. It shows you are a 'hard' worker and sets the stage for building your reputation at your organization.

Smile, Smile, Smile

First impressions are made within the first 10 seconds. You are going to meet a lot of people - you don't have to remember their name - but smile and be engaging. It will give them a good sample of who you really are and get you off on the right foot.

Ask Questions

You are not inexperienced, you just need to measure how you will do things, where things are, and what to do with them. If you don't ask questions, you will probably stall and not work as efficiently as you usually would. Get through those obstacles and make things happen!

Try To Eat With Your Boss or Peers

It gives you another chance to quiz them on the more intangible areas of your position/organization. In any event, try to have lunch with all of the people you will touch at your job.

Go Home & Relax

It's been a crazy day. Come home, get into comfy clothes, and lay down on your bed. Embrace the feeling and memories of your new job — review the day with your spouse or partner.  This debrief is not only important, it's critical. It allows you to download your thoughts, experiences and emotions.

Go To Bed Early

It's been a tough day — go to bed one hour early to be fresh for the next day!

Are You Married To Your Job?

Many clients, when making a major decision about their career, find themselves in a highly conflicted paradox. Based upon all the facts at hand, they want to leave their current job and move to another position at a new job. Simple right?

Not so fast. These clients begin to throw self-made obstacles in their way to discourage, upset, and impair their successful future move.

Why do they do this? Many times it's because they feel a close bond with their current boss, their team, or their company. In fact, any attempt to move forward with their search produces intense feelings of infidelity, like they are cheating on their spouse or significant other. They're doing something 'behind their back'.

A recent example — When going to lunch with a director of another competing firm, you might feel obligated to tell your boss about it, so there are no repercussions. Now why would you want to do that? Many people would feel that it's the 'right' thing to do.

Bottom line, it's none of your boss' business. Unless you are revealing deep company secrets to the other party (and you're not doing that) — no one needs to know, be informed, or get a heads-up about a potential meeting. Why do people do this? Because they feel a certain kinship or marriage to their current company. I've actually heard, "It would be the right thing to do."

The way that I address this as a coach is to take the white elephant from the corner of the room and place it smack dab in the middle of the conference room table.

• "Are you in any way, shape, or form, married to your company?" NO!
• "If given the opportunity and the circumstances were right, would your boss let you go without a second thought?" YES!
• "Then why do you feel that you need to care about them?" I DON'T KNOW — I JUST DO!
• "Do you feel when you meet people for lunch, interview with a recruiter, or pass around your resume, you are 'going behind the back' of your boss or company?" YES!

Why does this happen? Because you've spent a long time with your company and you've developed deep emotional bonds with your team, peers, superiors, clients, support staff, etc. When you make the decision to move, you suddenly feel that you are deceiving them  almost 'cheating' on them. Couple that with an intense feeling of self-worth loss if and when you do leave and they really don't miss you. By the way — that actually happens. They move on.

So when you feel this way, really investigate your fears — odds are they are just misplaced emotions that are holding you back.

Have you ever felt this way when you made the decision to look for employment elsewhere in the marketplace?