Failure: How You Deceive Yourself Everyday.

Wonder why you don't get certain things accomplished? Why you hit the same obstacles every time? It comes down to a simple phrase one of my clients so eloquently related to me the other day:

"I know the little games I play with myself."

You see, we all play games in our head. I know of no one who has a personality which is so buttoned up that they perform at optimum efficiency. We think we know some people like that — but the real truth is — they play games too.

The secret is knowing what the games are and why we do it. It's the what and the why that will deliver the insight you need to move past these games.

What games am I speaking of?

Do you dodge people at work? Do you procrastinate on important things? Do you show up late to appointments and meetings? Do you let important and timely decisions lay fallow until the 'right' moment? Again — we ALL do it. So let's pick an easy one:

"I am always late on paying my bills."

WHAT: "I don't open bills until the last minute." That's the reason or the game we play.

WHY: We are afraid of having reality hit us square in the face. We know we spent a lot this month — now the bill is here and is waiting to be paid. But it might not be as bad as you think. But you'll never know until you open it.

And when you do — it immediately forces you to make a decision — where am I going to get the money to pay this? Or if I don't have the money — I have to get it. I either have to work harder or borrow from savings. AND — here's the best part — it forces us to alter our behavior to ensure it doesn't happen again.

And that's the hard part. But I want you to now place yourself in the spot of someone who opens their bills immediately, schedules or pays them immediately, and moves on. How does that sound? How does that feel? Pretty good.

So why aren't you doing it?

Why You Hate AND Love Your Email.

Who loves their email? Lovin’ those 150-200 emails you receive each day? I expect your answer to be “NO”. But why do we put so much emphasis on it then? Why do we check it whenever we get a spare moment?

Why do we treat each email equally? That’s STUPID.

Email is not a good communication platform. Actually, it’s really not communicating – good communication happens in real-time and is two-way. How many misunderstood emails have you sent or received in your lifetime?

Here are some simple tricks I teach my clients:

1. Prioritize your email. Use Rules to assign colors to important emails (Red for the Boss or Clients, Blue for emails with you on the TO: line) and Gray for all other email. Trash any CC: email – trust me, it’s not important and you're not missing anything.

When you open your email (you never keep it open all day), you will immediately see the Red and Blue emails first - choose one of four actions:

Act - if you can respond within 1-2 minutes with an answer, do it. Delegate - Push it to someone else and let all parties know. File - Read info and file, not all emails need a response. Trash - Get it out of your head and life, stop thinking about it.

2. Check your email 3 times a day. In the morning, after lunch, and right before you leave. Instead of responding by email – call. If there is something important or an emergency, they should call you.

And most importantly, keep your email 'bat-signal' OFF. Having an animation or number appear only distracts you from your more important work.

3. Use the phone more often. Leave 20-30 second messages and only talk to someone for no longer than 3-5 minutes. If you need longer, set up a 10-15 minute meeting, no longer. You will get a reputation for short calls and your colleagues/clients will most likely pick up the phone rather than let it zip to voicemail.

4. Stop by offices more often. You then control the time you talk. Make the ‘drive-by’ 3-5 minutes and then be off.

At the end of the day, email will suck the living daylights out of your productivity, motivation, and life. Trust me.

What tips and tricks do you use to keep your email behaviors efficient and effective?

How To Be More Effective On The Job.

"Efficiency is doing things right; effectiveness is doing the right things." - Peter Drucker   Efficiency has been pounded into us since grade school.

• Keep your desk clean.
• Finish your tests on-time.
• Always have three sharpened pencils.
• Let's squeeze 7-8 classes into one day.

And the list goes on and on.

Even on the job, one is forced to comply to look busy, to fit as much 'stuff' into a workday as possible, to outshine your peers, and fly through your duties. It reminds me of a great song by Kevin Kline in the Sandra Boynton musical "Philadelphia Chickens" called 'Busy Busy Busy'*:

We’re very very busy And we’ve got a lot to do And we haven’t got a minute To explain it all to you For on Sunday Monday Tuesday There are people we must see And on Wednesday Thursday Friday We’re as busy as can be With our most important meetings And our most important calls And we have to do so many things And post them on the walls…

We have to hurry far away And then we hurry near And we have to hurry everywhere And be both there and here And we have to send out messages By e-mail, phone, and fax And we’re talking every minute And we really can’t relax And we think there is a reason To be running neck-and-neck And it must be quite important But we don’t have time to check.

I'm not saying efficiency is bad, it's just overrated. But effectiveness is the key to success. Just doing things will not deliver the requisite benefits — results are key in any endeavor. It's what differentiates you from the chattel who worry about their job every day.

Is this you? I have to:

• Do tons of work to show everyone I am the master of my domain.
• Read, assess, and answer all of the 150 emails I receive every day.
• Attend every meeting I'm invited to so I don't miss anything.
• Provide an audience to every person who comes into my office or passes by my cubicle.
• Never make a mistake - so I double- and triple-check every thing I do.
• Return every phone call, meet with every new prospect, and get on every project.
• Do the safe/easy things - I can do them quickly and not worry about not delivering quantity.
• "Push a lot of buttons to get results."

Now, focus on being effective:

• Out of the 150 emails I receive, what 10-20 are really important for my attention?
• What meetings are really important? (usually none)
• Setup specific times for open door policies and drive-by's.
• Who really is your key customer? What project will really deliver growth for the company?
• I tackle those things which will deliver maximum results and not worry about getting many little things done.
• How can I focus on the 20% which delivers the 80%?
• "I can push THE button."

What is the best reason for effectiveness?

It allows you to develop the confidence to take on new challenges, to push your envelope, and to not worry about failure. Because if you fail - you will just try again.

"Efficiency is making many things happen. Effectiveness is making IT happen." - Rich Gee

How do you balance efficiency and effectiveness?

*This song was introduced to my by one of my favorite and dearest colleagues, Diane Senior. Thank you Diane, I still laugh listening to the CD — it so reminded us of our environment at that time.